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Dark Tarot (Dark #31)(145)

Author:Christine Feehan

Sandu didn’t absolve himself so easily. He pressed Adalasia’s palm into his thigh. “I did not get that impression. I know when I recited my oath in the Cave of Fire, he joined with me. He knew the sacred oath. It was clear to me that he still will call upon his oath in an effort to keep darkness at bay. If the Bercovitz child had been his lifemate, he would have recognized that she was.”

Adalasia poured into his mind, a gentle loving warmth that filled the tears and rips still present from the ordeal he’d gone through. Once she was there, he didn’t want her to leave. She had a way of making him feel whole when he’d been torn apart.

I couldn’t find a way to save her—or him.

I looked into your memories, Sandu. I felt her as well. She pushed you from that place and made no effort to follow you. She didn’t want to leave. Whatever is holding her there is a powerful force, and it is her choice.

It is my duty to make certain she is all right.

She felt all right, didn’t she? When I searched your memories, I didn’t feel pain in her. Did you? The male behind the gates was frightening, but she was calm and composed. Purposeful. You cannot take on the world, Sandu. You were close to death. She helped to save your life, and you have to allow her that victory.

Sandu considered what his lifemate was saying. Always, a male protected a female. In this instance, Adalasia and the unknown woman had protected him. He had identified with the beast behind the gate—maybe too much. He wanted a different outcome for him. A way to save him, not keep him there. He wanted the Bercovitz child to be that beast’s lifemate, to have been the keeper of his soul. Sandu identified strongly with him, felt he was that feral beast, the demon he knew Adalasia feared.

I feared what I did not know, Sandu. I know you now. I know that beast protects you when you battle the undead. I welcome him because in the end, he will bring you home to me safe.

There was honesty between lifemates. He could hear the honesty in her voice. Feel it in his mind. She had seen him fight the undead. She had seen the demon rise.

Sandu, I love you. You have to feel the way I love you. All of you. Not just pieces of you. You are not divided. That feral beast and the charming, sweet man are one and the same. No person is just one-dimensional. You have many facets to you, and I love all of them. Well . . . your bossy side could tone it down.

That little teasing note stroked over him gently. Playfully. Her palm moved under his hand, fingers pressing deep into his thigh muscle, little points of flame.

“Perhaps you are right, Dax. Adalasia assures me that she searched my memories of the incident and as closely as she was able, inspected the woman’s voice and manner. She doesn’t believe she was in pain.”

“Or under undue duress,” Adalasia supplied. “She could have followed Sandu out of the portal, or even used it without aiding him, but she did neither.”

Danutdaxton nodded. “I agree with Adalasia on this, Sandu. The Old One does as well, and he rarely bothers to give his opinion. You have to let this go and leave her to her fate.”

“I do feel as if I am obligated to inform her brother,” Sandu said. “He has searched for news of her for centuries.”

Dax sat back in his chair. “That is a difficult decision. It would be wrong to withhold that information, but on the other hand, you have no way of knowing for certain if that child exchanged for the parasites is the Bercovitz girl. It could be giving him false hope. And how would he get to her? He is an ancient and very dark, Sandu. He stays alone for long periods of time. Several of the hunters watch him, and he has the ability to disappear almost before their eyes. He is very skilled in battle. We have no way of knowing what will push him over the edge.”

Adalasia sighed. “There are always two paths, aren’t there? Both dangerous. I keep thinking we are going to be shown a clear way, but we never are. How terrible not to tell this poor man who has searched for his only sister that she may still live.”

“Is she really alive, though?” Riley asked. “In that realm, could she still live?”

“She was alive,” Sandu said. “Absolutely she was alive. So was the male Carpathian.”

“You are certain he was a Carpathian?” Dax asked.

Sandu nodded slowly. “I would like to say otherwise, but he knew the ancient oath sworn to our people and our lifemates. He recited the oath with me when I needed it most. He even merged his voice with mine to chant. He spoke the ancient tongue. His voice was demonic, like that of a beast at times, but there was no doubt that he was Carpathian.” He hesitated and then told the truth. “I felt a brotherhood with him, just as I do for those in the monastery.”