Chapter 18
Monday
All I wanted to do was talk to Felix. But when he chose to play basketball with Cupcake instead of heading outside to run, I knew he wasn’t going to give me a chance to explain. He was ghosting me. A part of me knew I deserved it, but it still stung. No, students weren’t staring at me and whispering behind my back today. But I still felt isolated. I thought running would clear my mind. But I was no closer to figuring out why Kennedy was mad at me, and I had no plan on how to make Felix stop hating me.
I sighed as I headed toward lunch. I just wanted things to go back to normal. Normal. I tried to push the thought aside. I didn’t even know what normal was anymore. And I certainly didn’t want today to be my new normal. The only person that had been nice to me all day was Isabella. What twisted reality was I living in?
“Not sitting with Isabella?” Kennedy asked but didn’t look up from her chicken sandwich.
“No, I’m sitting with you. Like always. Where’s Cupcake?”
She shrugged.
I tried to spot Felix and Cupcake in one of the lines for food. But I didn’t see either of them. I knew Cupcake would sit with us whenever he got here. And that should draw Felix over too, right? I just needed five minutes to explain what happened. He’d listen about the blackmail. He’d understand that I just didn’t want anyone to get hurt. Except I hurt him.
I swallowed hard. I needed to focus on fixing one relationship at a time. And since Felix wasn’t here…I needed to figure out why Kennedy was giving me the cold shoulder.
“Do you want to come over after school?” I asked. I hadn’t gotten Kennedy on Mr. Pruitt’s list yet, but I had a feeling Miller would let me sneak her in. Maybe I could force her to take half the clothes that the stylist had given to me. Kennedy was taller than me, but we’d swapped clothes before. Besides, she liked her skirts and dresses shorter than I did.
“I’m still not really feeling that well. I think I’ll just head straight home after school.”
“Could I come over to your place then?” I asked.
She pushed around some applesauce with her spoon and didn’t look up.
“What are you doing, Sissy?” Isabella said from behind me.
Couldn’t she see that my best friend was distressed? Of course she couldn’t. Isabella only cared about herself. “Eating lunch,” I said.
“But you promised to eat with me and my friends, sillykins. I saved a seat for your bffl too this time. Come, ladies.” She turned on her heel and walked over to the Untouchables’ table. I saw the two seats beside Matt were empty. I could finally sit right next to him at lunch for the first time since Isabella had started blackmailing him. Or threatening to kill me. Or whatever the hell she was doing.
I pressed my lips together. But I couldn’t go over there. Not when Kennedy was mad at me. God, why had I even considered it? Isabella was a monster. I could hang out with Matt some other time. Today I was solely focused on making sure Kennedy was alright. “We don’t have to,” I said, but Kennedy was already grabbing her tray.
“No, I want to,” she said.
“You do? But there isn’t a seat for Cupcake.”
She laughed. “It’s fine, I can’t pass up the opportunity to watch Isabella in her natural habitat.”
At least she’d laughed. “If you’re sure it’s alright?” I said and stood up too.
“Absolutely. Plus, you’ll get to sit with Matt.”
I couldn’t even hide my smile as we walked over to their table. Matt looked up at me as I approached. He rubbed his nose and I’m pretty sure my smile grew. I sat down next to him and I realized I was holding my breath. I quickly exhaled and tried to pretend this wasn’t momentous.
“Hey,” James said. He was the first person to acknowledge my presence and I was grateful. “How was your weekend?”
Awful. Wonderful. “Weird,” I said.
He smiled.
“I heard you got into Harvard. Congrats.”
His smile faltered. “Thanks.”
“Congratulations are in order for me too,” Mason said as he lightly punched James’ shoulder. “He’s not the only one that got his letter.”
“Wow, that’s awesome,” I said.
Mason gave me his signature smile that had the whole female student body kneeling at his feet at parties. It didn’t have the same effect on me. It just made me feel uncomfortable. And reminded me that Mason didn’t know that I was dating his little brother.