Emily sat down in a little chair that had been placed on her balcony. “My mom always used to say that everything turns out the way it’s supposed to, that the decisions you make are the ones you were supposed to make.”
“Huh,” Priya said. “So we think we have free will, but we don’t?”
The sun shone down and Emily lifted up her face to feel the rays on her skin. “Yeah, that’s what she thought. I’ve been using that as an excuse, though, I think. For years. I think I have to take responsibility for what I’ve done.”
“Oh, Em.” Priya’s voice was full of sympathy. “I wish I were there to give you a hug right now.”
“Me too,” Emily said.
“Listen,” Priya told her, “you’ve got a good head on your shoulders. Things are starting to come clear. I have faith in you. You’ll figure it all out. You’ll find a way to be happy.”
“Thank you,” Emily answered. “That means a lot. No matter what, I’ll see you soon.”
Emily sat in her room and worked on her song, pulling up a piano keyboard app on her phone to figure out the accompaniment until Rob knocked on her door.
“Hungry?” he asked. “It’s way past lunchtime.”
Emily nodded, and the two of them headed down to the beachside restaurant. They recaptured a bit of the fun they’d had the day before, laughing and smiling together, but it felt like an echo of yesterday.
“You still want to play tonight?” he asked as they were finishing up.
“If you’ll still have me,” she said.
He laughed. “Queenie,” he said. “When will you realize that I’ll always still have you?”
He stood up and reached out his hand for her. She took it and the two of them walked back to the villa to get ready for the show.
59
Emily watched again from the wings. Rob was still objectively fantastic, but there was something missing from this show, like he’d been slightly wrung out. If you didn’t know him, you wouldn’t expect anything else, but since she did, she could see it. Diana did, too.
“What happened?” she asked Emily. “Is he still pissed about what I said this morning?”
Emily pretended not to hear her. Rob hadn’t shared his conversation with Diana, and she hadn’t asked. She wondered if it had anything to do with her.
When it was time for the last song, Rob introduced her, this time calling her Emily Gold, saying she was a friend from a long time ago who inspired him, leaving out the line about her being the one that got away, playing that aspect of things way down. She walked on stage to a round of applause and waved, and then she heard someone shout, “Em!”
It was a voice she’d know anywhere. Ezra. He was here. She shaded her eyes and tried to look out into the audience, but she couldn’t find him.
Before he could call out again, Rob was starting “Crystal Castle” and then Emily’s fingers were on the keys and she was singing her part. She heard the crowd singing along with them, saw them with their arms around one another swaying. She felt the surge of the audience’s love travel through her, grow within her.
Rob turned and winked, as if to say, Even when we’re off, we’re on.
She smiled and kept singing, kept playing. But thoughts of Ezra intruded. He was here. Somewhere out there. Did There aren’t enough words mean that he was going to fly to Mexico? Was she supposed to have figured that out?
When the clapping started, Rob walked toward her on the stage, so their voices were drowned out by the audience. “Who called your name?” he whispered, even though she was pretty sure he already knew. “I saw your face. It’s someone you know.”
“It’s Ezra,” she whispered back.
She could see Rob thinking, and then he said softly, “Do you want to sing for him? Your song?”
“My song?” she echoed.
The applause died down. “Em!” She heard Ezra call again from somewhere down below. He wanted her to know he was there, that he’d come to talk to her. He didn’t disappear this time, and he didn’t let her disappear either. She wanted to send him a message, too.
She turned to Rob and nodded.
He turned to the audience. “We’ve got some’m real special for all y’all tonight. Our girl Emily here’s been working on a brand-new song. And this is the first time anyone but me’s ever gonna hear it.”
The audience cheered. The stage went dark, except for a spot on Emily. She saw Rob sit down and sip a glass of water someone had stuck under a stool for him. Then she started to play.