It抯 strapless. The line of my collarbone and curve of my shoulder are exposed above the intricately detailed corset. Alluring without being outrageous. The hand-stitched lace leads to layers of cloud-soft tulle and a sweeping train that trails several feet behind me. I抳e never felt more beautiful than I do wearing this dress. It抯 a gown meant for a bride who抯 excited about her wedding. Who has no doubts梐bout anything, much less her choice of groom.
Somewhat unfortunately, not to mention surprisingly, I fulfill both criteria.
Hovering in the doorway, I watch my mother swipe at her cheeks before she speaks. I figured I had another twenty minutes before she returned from running through every detail with the wedding planner梐gain. 揝carlett! Why are you wearing your dress already? Your hair still needs to be done.?
Nadia and Sophie both startle at the sound of her sharp tone. I know it well, though. It抯 much easier to mask emotions under harshness than happiness.
揑 know. I抣l change back.?I smile at Sophie and Nadia. 揑抣l see you guys after, okay??They take the offered out, slipping back out of the room immediately. I抦 left to change and face my mother. I hang my wedding dress back inside its bag and pull on the silk robe I was wearing before, over the white lingerie my husband won抰 see.
揧ou抮e ready??my mother asks. For more than the hairdresser, I gather.
I inhale, then make the request I抳e debated since I woke up this morning. I expected it to feel like an ordinary day. None of it has felt that way. Not showering or eating breakfast or riding to the cathedral where I抣l become Scarlett Kensington. 揑s Crew here??
My mother studies me, curiosity burning in the hazel irises I inherited. 揙f course.?She sounds offended by the mere possibility he might not be. Any hiccup today would be more than a slight against me.
揅an you単et him??
My mom sighs. 揝carlett, if you抮e having second thoughts棓
揑抦 not. I just want to talk to him.?
揑 don抰 think that棓
I cut her off again. 揗om. Please.?
Maybe it抯 the please that convinces her. I抦 not sure the last time that word was spoken between us. From my mouth, at least.
揙kay. I抣l ask.?She disappears out into the expanse of the cathedral that抯 filled with people preparing for the wedding or guests showing up extra early for good seats.
I抦 all alone in here.
The star of the show and the pariah.
I抦 nervous. I didn抰 think I would be, and it抯 the final sign that this is not a business deal. A merger like any other. Maybe it is to Arthur Kensington. To my father. To the rest of Manhattan抯 elite, who have all gossiped about the possibility of this day for years. To Crew. But for me, it抯 different. Telling myself it isn抰 won抰 change that fact.
This is my wedding, my marriage.
It抯 personal.
When the door opens again a few minutes later, I know it抯 not my mother. I can just tell.
He came.
揧ou抮e not wearing your dress.?
I turn to face him. 揧ou抮e not supposed to see me in my dress until I抦 down the aisle.?
揑 didn抰 think you were the superstitious type. Or particularly sentimental.?Crew says the words casually, before slipping his hands in his pockets. He looks relaxed. Completely at ease about what is about to happen between us, and it loosens the tight knot in my chest some.
揑 don抰 want our first kiss to be out there.?I blurt the statement, which is really more of a request.
Something about today梩he dress and the dreaminess and the date itself梙as led me to the very real realization today is my wedding. In all likelihood, I抣l never have another. I抣l be married to this man for the rest of my life. And I抳e never even kissed him.
Should it bother me? Probably not.
But it does.
Something akin to amusement settles in his face. 揑s that so??
It抯 tempting to back down, but I don抰。 揧es.?I study him, trying to get a read on what he抯 thinking. Feeling. I come up blank. He抯 as effusive as an empty page. 揧ou were basically begging to kiss me a few weeks ago,?I remind him of our moment in the library.
A ghost of a smile flickers across his face, as if that memory is a fond one rather than a frustrating one. 揑 remember.?
揝o??I抦 growing impatient. Annoyed. Why can抰 anything between us be straightforward?
揇o you??
揇o I what??I抦 rapidly regretting this entire idea. He抯 right; it抯 not like me. Maybe this marriage won抰 last, and it抣l never matter anyway.
揜emember.?
My spine straightens like it was just injected with lead as the implication hits. 揧ou can抰 be serious.?
Crew tilts his head to the left, showing off the sharp line of his jaw. It tightens as his expression turns daring. 揃eg me, and I抣l kiss you, Scarlett.?