“Hello, London!” I call. The crowd whoops and shouts. “Thank you so much for joining us today. It’s wonderful to finally see you all in person, instead of talking to you through a microphone. My name is Luke—”
“I’m Josh,” Josh adds.
“And I’m Zack,” Zack says, his voice rough.
I don’t let my smile falter. “And we are Three Single Guys, who are absolutely unqualified to answer your relationship questions. So let’s get on with it. Today, we’re going to be doing advice as normal, but instead of reading your emails, we’ll be taking live questions from you, the audience.”
The crowd cheers and screams, stamping and clapping. I point to Katie, who’s hovering on the main floor, clutching a wireless microphone. “Our lovely assistant Katie is standing at the front of the room. Can you give us a wave, Katie? If we pick you out to ask us a question, Katie will come to where you’re sitting and give you the mic.”
I glance between Josh and Zack. Neither of them add anything, both stony-faced.
I swallow a sigh. “Right. Let’s get started, then. Who’s got a question for us?”
Hands go up throughout the auditorium. I start scanning the crowd, but before I can pick someone to speak, a voice shouts: “Where’s Layla?”
“Layla will not be attending,” I say. “We’ve decided to… part ways. She won’t be on the podcast anymore. I’m very sorry, if any of you came to see her specifically.”
A ripple goes through the crowd. I can see faces fall. One girl raises her hand, and Josh points at her. Katie scurries forward and passes her the mic.
“So the rumours are true?” The girl asks in a hushed tone. “She did cheat on you?”
Jesus Christ.
“Layla didn’t cheat on us,” Zack mutters. “We weren’t actually dating. You all got that, right?”
I give him a warning look.
The girl at the microphone narrows her eyes. “It didn’t look fake in the pictures from the wedding,” she accuses.
Zack shrugs. “What can I say? I’m a good actor.”
The fan looks incensed. “So it was all acting?!” She demands. “The segment wasn’t real?!”
Josh frowns. “It was real—” he starts.
“Then what happened?” She presses. “Why are you discontinuing the segment? We didn’t even get to find out what happened at the end!”
Zack opens his mouth, and I lean forward, cutting him off before he can speak. “Sorry to tease you all like this. Some factors that were out of our control occurred, which means that we cannot do any more episodes featuring Layla.”
“But that’s the best bit!” The woman whines. “I—”
“Next question,” Josh interrupts her. “You. The man in the white shirt.”
The woman scowls, but Katie gently moves her aside, offering the next man the mic.
He grunts as he stands up, smoothing down the legs of his pants. “It sounded like you were really falling for her,” he says. “Is that why she’s not here?”
My shoulders slump.
“An advice question, please,” Josh says, his voice strained. “Anyone?”
The next person up is a middle-aged guy wearing a bright blue PodFest t-shirt. “Did you argue with her?” He asks excitedly. “Did she not want to pick one of you? It seemed like she really liked you.”
Zack finally snaps. “For God’s sake,” he bursts out, slamming his hand on the table. “Is Layla all you guys are gonna ask about?” He turns to us. “Hell, we may as well tell them.”
Josh fixes him with a hard stare. “This isn’t the time or the place for you to kick off—”
“Why the Hell not? They’re asking. They obviously want to know, so why don’t we tell them?”
“Oh, shut up,” Josh says, his eyes burning. “As if you care about her. You don’t give a crap about her or how she feels, or you wouldn’t have—”
I reach across and put my hand over his mic. The resulting pop of static makes most of the audience wince. A few people clap their hands over their ears.
“Next question,” I say brightly. “Who’s up?” A bunch of hands raise in the air. I nod to Katie. “Katie, can you pick someone, please?”
She nods, running her eyes over the crowd and waving one man forward. He’s wearing a stupid graphic tee with the words SUCK IT GOOD LADIES emblazoned on the front, and a baseball cap jammed down over his face. I don’t even recognise him until he steps up to the mic and tilts his face up to look at us.