It was four in the afternoon when Will left them. He told his mother he’d be home late, and not to worry about him. There were half a dozen parties he knew about and wanted to go to. He had waited a lifetime for this day and was determined to enjoy it to the fullest. Audrey was sure he’d come home drunk, but he’d try not to wake them. It had been a beautiful day, and she smiled when Will kissed her on the cheek and left a few minutes later. For an instant, she envied him the freedom he would have now. It was so different being a man. He could do whatever he wanted, and always would. She had so much less independence as a woman, and it would have been that way even if her mother wasn’t sick. As a young single girl, Audrey’s life was much more restricted than Will’s. And even one day if she married, she would never have the freedom her brother did. He could go and do and be whatever he chose. The same opportunities weren’t available to women.
She and her mother had a quiet dinner at the kitchen table that night. Her mother looked exhausted by the emotions and exertions of the day, and she was grateful when Audrey helped her up the stairs and put her to bed at eight o’clock. She was asleep minutes later, and Audrey went to her own room, listening to the silence in the house. She could hear a dog barking in the distance and a car honking. She could imagine the graduates going from party to party that night, celebrating. Their graduation from Annapolis was a huge accomplishment and an important rite of passage. Audrey knew that nothing in her life would ever be like that, neither her own high school graduation in a week, nor her graduation from nursing school in three years, which would be a quiet, ladylike event. Annapolis was a very, very big deal, and would win Will the respect of his peers and superiors for the rest of his life. Nothing Audrey had achieved, or ever would, would compare to it, in her eyes or the eyes of others. She knew how much it had meant to her mother. She’d been smiling when she fell asleep. Will had done it. He had fulfilled their father’s dream. Will had known what was expected of him ever since he was a small child. He had never wavered for an instant. The navy was going to be his life, and planes his passion. The navy was what their family did, and what was expected of him.
* * *
—
Will went to Audrey’s high school graduation, just as she had gone to his at Annapolis. He had stood tall and proud and handsome in his uniform, and had taken care of their mother while Audrey went through the ritual of getting her diploma. Her mother wasn’t well that day, and she wasn’t up to lunch. She had nearly fallen twice on their way into the auditorium, and they went home right after the ceremony so their mother could lie down. Audrey said she didn’t mind, but Will felt bad that there was no celebration for her. She hardly had time to say goodbye to her friends before she had to rush off to help her mother. The other girls were going out to lunch with their families, as they had with Will, but Ellen was too frail and unsteady for a restaurant that day. The other girls were kind to her when she left hurriedly, but Audrey knew she was already an outsider, and had been for years, being stuck at home with her mother so much of the time. It was a sacrifice Audrey had made willingly, which Will admired her for.
Will spoke to her quietly after she took a tray of food up to their mother’s room, and he found her in the kitchen in her frilly white dress, with daisies braided into her hair. She looked innocent and young, and as though she didn’t have a care in the world. Audrey had a way of putting a positive spin on everything. There was nothing mournful about her.
“Are you okay?” he asked her gently, and she nodded with a smile. He couldn’t help noticing how beautiful she was, and he hoped she would have a more exciting life one day. “I’m sorry we didn’t get to take you to lunch,” he said, and genuinely meant it.
“It’s fine, I don’t mind.” She looked unruffled and peaceful. “Mom hasn’t felt well for the past few days. I don’t think her new medicine is working.” They had tried everything available to them, but none of the medications for Parkinson’s really worked for her.
“I worry about you after I leave,” Will said softly. He wanted her to have a life, but their mother was so ill.
“We’ll be fine,” she reassured him. They had already arranged for a nurse to check on her mother twice a day after Audrey started nursing school. Their father had carefully set aside savings for them for years, and they had his pension, so they had enough for all their needs, a nice home, and for Audrey’s school. “I’m going to miss you, but you can’t sit here for the rest of your life,” Audrey said to him fairly, and they both knew it was true. The days of being all together and having Will near at hand were over. He was a grown-up now, soon to be a navy pilot. That sounded very grown up to her, and to Will. Their father had hoped Will would be the captain of a ship one day, and that his boyhood passion for airplanes would fade. But planes were where Will’s heart was, and he intended to live his dream to the fullest. And both his mother and sister wanted him to.