“That wasn’t anything and you know it.”
“You let her kiss you.” I was still furious that he’d allowed anyone near his lips. “And I know you didn’t want it, but the fury that licked through me probably made me pass out. To think what would happen to me if you actually wanted someone else—”
“Never going to happen, Lamb.” He paced toward me on a mission.
“It could, considering I’ve decided to move on.”
“You do have to move on,” he concluded. But him agreeing with me almost brought me to my knees.
I gasped as he said it, sure I’d heard him wrong. “Right.” I pushed my wavy hair back and tried not to give in to my heart breaking in front of him. This would have to happen anyway. It was good he was on board. Even if it hurt like hell. “Well, I think the best way to do it is to remain friends for the family and try to forget all that’s happened between us. I’m happy we had what we did—”
“You’ll be even happier when you figure out that we’re going to have more than we ever did before.” He took a step forward, and I narrowed my eyes. “Together. Not apart, Lamb.” He narrowed his eyes back at me. “Why can’t you see we’re better together?”
“You kissed my sister, Dante,” I tried to explain, “and I almost died. That’s an indicator we won’t work. Also, my brothers—”
“You think I’m afraid of your brothers?”
“Dom is going to be livid.”
“He’s already livid. He’ll just have to punch me a few more times.”
“I have a disorder. I can't be happy half the time.”
“Sure, but everyone has a disorder if you dig hard enough, and I’m willing to find your way back to happiness every time.”
“I can’t have kids with you!” I screamed at him, tears in my eyes.
“Little Lamb.” He was in front of my face now, holding my cheeks like he could hold me together. I leaned into his touch because I think my body believed he could. “Do you know my mom’s moving?”
“She’s …” His hands were in my hair, feeling my skull. “Are you checking my head?”
“Just have to be sure. Does anywhere hurt when I press?”
“No. Are you serious?” I stuttered. “I’m a nurse. I know when it’s fine.”
He pressed on my temples and then my skull and neck. “Pressure points matter, Lilah. It’s an acupuncture technique. This is good,” he murmured and kissed my temple. “Real good.”
“Your mom’s selling her farm?” Why did that make the tears spill over immediately. “Who will take care of the animals? And Emmy? And my lamb is—”
“You’ll take care of them,” he said like it was just another sentence to throw out, not monumental at all.
“Me?” I whispered, but it sounded strangled, completely confused as I pointed to myself. “I’m not … I don’t have the means to—”
He shoved a note in my hand. It was wrinkled and worn like he’d been carrying it for days. I unfolded it slowly, my hands shaking, my heart beating fast.
Seven to Lilah’s Heaven
Lilah’s Eat Pray Love List
1. Leave home （done）
2. Do something crazy （you went to jail, Lamb）
3. Explore food here and EAT （you like gelato, quesitos, mofongo, and mojitos … too much）
4. Explore places here and PRAY （you read at the beach, saw the fort, the streets, the stores, any other places?）-the bioluminescent water, a statue
5. Explore men and LOVE
*explored voyeurism
*explored water play
*What else, Lamb? （wax play）
6. Find peace （I can search with you forever）
7. Find heaven （with me）
*buy the farm
*accept a proposal
*marry the wolf
“I bought the farm at double her asking price. For us.”
“You what?” I screeched.
Dante whispered, “I’m going to marry you, Little Lamb, and we're going to have babies here. Right where you think expectations are too burdensome and people are always thinking you’re the absolute best. And instead you’re going to get dirty on this farm with me and prove them all wrong.”
“Are you insane?”
He went down on one knee, and he smiled bigger than I’d ever seen him smile. “I asked your dad for your hand earlier this week. I don’t think he gives a shit that your brothers are going to beat the piss out of me. I don’t either. I’ll let them have a couple good punches, then I’ll make sure we’re all on the same page.”