He pointed to the empty chair and closed his office door, feeling the eyes and wonder of everyone on the floor watching Delia Shannon cross his threshold. This was crazy, he told himself, but he couldn’t help it.
“It’s smaller than I thought it would be,” Delia said.
“What every man wants to hear,” Ted said, smiling when Delia smiled.
“Your office, Ted. I was talking about your office.”
“Me too.”
Delia checked her watch. “One minute and forty seconds.”
“Don’t be like that. Don’t be hard. I hate it when women—”
“It’s men who make women hard. We are so fucking fed up with you lying sacks of—”
“When did I lie to you?”
“You told Casey that I gave you herpes. I don’t fucking have herpes. Who else did you tell? Besides your frigid wife?” Delia’s face was dark red now.
“I, I—”
“Don’t lie to me, Ted. You lied to your wife, and now you’re lying to me. I don’t even care anymore. I have to go. But if you tell one more person that I have herpes, I will show you what pain is.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“No, asshole, I’m giving you an option. Yeah, that’s a word you should understand.”
Delia got up and opened the door. “I don’t normally say this, but I really hate you.” She left, and Ted watched her close the door.
He couldn’t work. There were fat deal books to review, a growing list of calls to return, and he couldn’t concentrate. He pushed the four digits of her extension.
“It’s me.”
“I know it’s you. Don’t call me again.”
“I didn’t know that you didn’t have herpes.” Ted checked the door, and it was closed.
“Well, I don’t.”
“But I was told that most people can’t really be tested for—I mean, I hadn’t been with anyone else except for you—I mean, after I got married—”
“I had the bloodwork done, and I’ve never had any signs— What the fuck. Why am I even talking to you? Your wife could’ve had a tiny cold sore, given you a blow job, and that’s all it takes, buddy.”
Ted grew silent. Ella didn’t like oral sex, but she did it occasionally if he asked. From time to time she did get cold sores; so did he if he was tired. He didn’t know that it could transfer that way.
“What I want to know is, how? How did you find out? What did Casey say?” Ted got angry at just the thought of her. To think he’d gotten her a job.
“Well, my friend Casey Han stopped speaking to me around Christmas, and when I asked her why, she told me about your little wife who threw a fit about getting herpes, but then, despite her being pissed at you, she never left your sorry ass. I bet a million dollars that she stopped screwing you, and God, does that knowledge give me pleasure.”
“What?”
“I’ve studied this very carefully, Ted. I’ve slept with a fair number of married men. Believe me, I’m not bragging. And do you know what happens when a wife finds out?”
Ted didn’t have any guesses except for his own experience. But it was true, Ella had only put on more weight, and since Christmas, she’d more or less said no to him three times out of four. And she’d gotten a job at the boys’ school where she used to work. But lately, he didn’t even want to anymore. That is, have sex with her. But he figured it would pass. He’d been focusing on his work.
“What happens when a wife finds out?” His voice grew timid. He felt sure Delia knew the answers.
“She can leave, but almost none of these moron Wall Street wives leave a good meal ticket, and you make too much money— And a boy of your status isn’t easily replaced. Especially if the wife has lost her looks.”
“Ella isn’t like that—”
“Oh, now you defend her.” Delia laughed. “Listen, pal, I have to go. I have real work to do.”
“No, please. Tell me what happens.”
“Or she stays and takes revenge.”
Again, Ted wanted to say that Ella wasn’t this way. She wasn’t the sort who’d exact punishment. And it was true. Ella had an exceedingly forgiving nature. She possessed a mild temperament. She’d never brought up Delia again, and she was always kind to him. Dinner was on the table whenever he was home, she took perfect care of the house and Irene. On his birthday, she’d cooked his favorite dishes. His parents adored her, and she spoke to them weekly. She and Ted never argued. He had nothing but respect for Ella. She was a wonderful person, a good mother, what a Christian woman was supposed to be like. But they did not touch anymore. They went to bed at different times—and it was easier this way, because then there was no conflict or unease.