“Delia,” he said, “I love you. We’re going to be together, please believe me—” Ted took his right hand off the stroller handle and finger-combed his hair. “You mean everything to me. It will all work out.”
Casey cleared her throat out of instinct more than anything else. The cough was involuntary, as if her body hadn’t wanted to hear any more of this. Ted turned around this time, his mouth agape slightly, but said nothing. Casey shook her head at him but could think of nothing to say. Tina’s flowers—lily of the valley encased in their pale green leaves—were still on the chair near the mirror where Tina had left them. Casey walked steadily toward them, unable to look in Ted’s direction. She picked up the bouquet and quickly returned upstairs.
In the sanctuary, they were done: vows said, rings exchanged, union blessed. Tina and Chul did an about-face to leave the church. As they began to march back down the aisle—carpeted with a white strip of cloth that the florists had put down that morning—Casey slipped the bouquet into her sister’s hand. Tina smiled at Casey—she hadn’t noticed its absence. She was married to Chul. For Tina, it was easily the happiest day of her life. Chul was the kindest, loveliest boy she had ever known, and she was profoundly attracted to him, interested in all his thoughts. When she was in his arms, she felt everything was good. It was true they were young, but she had found love.
Casey could see her sister’s happiness, and she was pleased, but Ella had looked happy on her day, too. Casey had no wish to be a cynic in love. Losing Jay had been hard, but somehow she had trusted that it wouldn’t work for them forever, and that had given her the courage to stick to her decision—to withstand the loneliness. And perhaps that fact alone was the sign that Casey was still hopeful about love, because she wanted marriage to be an eternal bond.
Unu touched her elbow. “Honey, it’s time for us to walk, too.”
“I just heard Ted telling Delia that he loves her. He’s meeting her at eleven. Tonight.” The words just tumbled out.
Unu turned around. “What an asshole.”
“That’s what I should have said. Damn,” Casey whispered, her teeth clenched in a formal smile.
They were walking behind her parents. Joseph tried to smile at the guests, and Leah’s shy gaze fell to the white fabric carpet.
Casey adjusted the strap of her dress, and Unu slowed his pace. He couldn’t help recalling his own wedding every time he went to one. His wife, too, had been a beautiful bride, and she had seemed very happy. Women were just better at faking their feelings.
“Marriage. What a fucking sham,” Unu mumbled.
“We’re well aware of your thoughts on the institution. But what should I do?” Casey asked, annoyed by his comment.
“You gotta tell Ella.” He shrugged. “You know where my loyalties lie.” The fact that Ted could cheat on Ella was unbelievable to him. Ella was a saint, a beautiful, kind, and good person. How could he do that to her?
Asshole. She should’ve called him an asshole, Casey thought. She should’ve said something, anything, thrown her purse at him. Perhaps it was seeing Irene, sleeping so perfectly the sleep of an eight-month-old girl—her right fist curled softly, her Raggedy Ann checked dress—that had struck her dumb while hearing Ted telling his mistress that he loved her.
She felt like killing him. Because of him, she’d been avoiding Delia. Delia had called in January, and when they finally had that incredibly awkward talk about her and Ted, Casey had pretty much explained how Ella didn’t want her to be friends with her. It was something out of junior high school with an adult flavor. But Casey missed Delia. She was a real friend, and though she knew Delia was at fault, she was far more upset with Ted because he was the married one. For some reason, Casey had never cared that Delia slept with married men. Maybe because Delia never seemed to want anything from them. In Casey’s mind, it was absolutely possible that Delia was a good friend and that she could sleep with married men; there was no conflict. Now it seemed more complicated, because Delia had told her that it was over. But that conversation had been in January. And it sounded as if Ted was really in love. What would happen if Delia had fallen in love, too? And Ella and Irene? How about them? Casey felt scared for them.
Casey and Unu stopped walking as they approached the receiving line. Her arm was linked with his. The photographer snapped his camera.
“Again, please,” the photographer asked.
Casey glanced at Unu and together they smiled politely at him.