Midas would never have done that.
And despite such difficult topics, Slade seemed relieved after. Like this was a weight he’s been pulling behind him, secreted away from view as he silently shouldered the responsibility. But now that it’s all out in the open, he seems more self-assured and ready.
But me? My mind has been turned to mush, like porridge that’s had an overabundance of oats added. It’s a sticky slop with too many grains of thought congealed together in my head.
My sleep is fitful that night. I’m not sure when we finally all go to bed, but by the time we do, I wake up in desultory pieces, as fragments of dreams cut through my consciousness. I’m overloaded with brand new information coming at me from all directions.
I dream of the rotted prisoner. Of Ryatt screaming in my face to leave his home. Of Elore, only I see her from Slade’s account, of when he made that rip in the world, of her screaming until her voice no longer worked. I dream of Queen Kaila holding me hostage with ropes of collected whispers. I dream of my gold bursting out of me and encasing all of Drollard.
When my eyes drag open after that last dream, I decide not to close them again.
I’m done.
Not with sleep—but with me. With this heavy undertow, where I’m trying to move one way but I actually keep dragging myself back. And I’m not just holding myself back either, I’m also holding back a king who needs to protect his kingdom.
I know what I have to do.
So, I carefully get out of bed, even though we only just got into it a few hours ago. I quietly dress and then go to the door, checking on Slade’s sleeping form before I slip out. From the hook beside the banked fire in the living room, I grab my coat and shrug it on before stepping into my boots. The house is quiet and still and cold, but I’m shrouded in a nervous warmth.
The normally creaky front door of the Grotto doesn’t make a sound as I open it and slip out. Ahead, the cave yawns open with the barest hint of dawn cresting against the landscape. I walk toward the muted light, tucking my hands beneath my arms as I leave the protection of the cavern.
The air is placid and raw, the kind of cold that sticks to your breath and makes your lungs feel like ice. I turn my back on the silent village and aim up the slope, my steps sure, my mind determined.
Because I’m going to master my power.
If Slade could learn to do it when he was eight, then I can do it now. I have to.
So I drag my ass up the freezing hill, with my body encased in the shade of the mountain to my right. I go past the Perch, past the Mole, cursing under my breath as my boots sink into the snow and my legs burn. I forgot how long the walk was to get up here. But finally, I pull myself into the cave that’s polluted with the splashes of gold I left behind.
My eyes adjust to the dim lighting, to the solidified gold that’s pooled in the center of the rocky floor. When I move closer though, a shadow that I’d mistaken for one of the rock formations shifts. I jump back in surprise, a yelp popping out of my lips.
I stare wide-eyed at the timberwing that unfolds its wings, lifting its head to look at me.
“Great Divine, you scared me,” I say shakily, hand covering my now racing heart.
The giant beast raises its nose, like it’s scenting me.
I’m going to go out on a shaky limb and say that’s not a good sign.
It watches me entirely too closely from its spot on the gilded ground, while I debate what the hell to do.
“The last time I was conscious around a timberwing, it wanted to eat my face off, so I need you to go.”
A pair of glowing eyes blink.
The thing is bigger than a horse, with massive wings held against its dappled body, taloned feet tucked beneath it. If it was surprised by my appearance, it certainly doesn’t show it, nor is it threatened by me. And why would it be? It’s got a mouth full of razor-sharp teeth.
I take my hand away from my chest long enough to flick at it. “Go on. Shoo.”
I honestly didn’t really think that was going to work, so I’m not surprised when it just continues to sit there. A sigh comes out of me, and I cross my arms. “Look, I just had to walk a very long way to get here. Through the snow. Uphill. So I’m not leaving. I need this space to practice my magic because I can’t be in a populated kingdom without getting a hold of my power until I’m sure I won’t gild a whole castle. Again.”
The beast yawns.
“Oh, you’re bored?” I drawl, fisting my hands at my hips. “Fine, then. If you get gilded while I’m practicing, don’t come crying to me about it. It’ll be entirely your fault.”