When she had shoved and pushed her way through the mob for a block beyond Five
Points the crowd thinned a little and, gathering up her skirts, she began to run again. When she reached Wesley Chapel, she was breathless and dizzy and sick at her stomach. Her stays were cutting her ribs in two. She sank down on the steps of the church and buried her head in her hands until she could breathe more easily. If she could only get one deep breath, way down in her abdomen. If her heart would only stop bumping and drumming and cavorting. If there were only someone in this mad place to whom she could turn.
Why, she had never had to do a thing for herself in all her life. There had always been
someone to do things for her, to look after her, shelter and protect her and spoil her. It was incredible that she could be in such a fix. Not a friend, not a neighbor to help her. There had always been friends, neighbors, the competent hands of willing slaves. And now in this hour of
greatest need, there was no one. It was incredible that she could be so completely alone, and frightened, and far from home.
Home! If she were only home, Yankees or no Yankees. Home, even if Ellen was sick. She
longed for the sight of Ellen's sweet face, for Mammy's strong arms around her.
She rose dizzily to her feet and started walking again. When she came in sight of the
house, she saw Wade swinging on the front gate. When he saw her, his face puckered and he began to cry, holding up a grubby bruised finger.
"Hurt!" he sobbed. "Hurt!"
"Hush! Hush! Hush! Or I'll spank you. Go out in the back yard and make mud pies and
don't move from there."
"Wade hungwy," he sobbed and put tin hurt finger in his mouth.
"I don't care. Go in the back yard and--" She looked up and saw Prissy leaning out of the upstairs window, fright and worry written on her face; but in an instant they were wiped away in relief as she saw her mistress. Scarlett beckoned to her to come down and went into the house.
How cool it was in the hall. She untied her bonnet and flung it on the table, drawing her forearms across her wet forehead. She heard the upstairs door open and a low wailing moan, wrenched from the depths of agony, came to her ears. Prissy came down the stairs three at a time.
"Is de doctah come?"
"No. He can't come."
"Gawd, Miss Scarlett! Miss Melly bad off!"
"The doctor can't come. Nobody can come. You've got to bring the baby and I'll help
you."
Prissy's mouth fell open and her tongue wagged wordlessly. She looked at Scarlett
sideways and scuffed her feet and twisted her thin body.
"Don't look so simple minded!" cried Scarlett, infuriated at her silly expression. "What's the matter?"
Prissy edged back up the stairs.
"Fo' Gawd, Miss Scarlett--"Fright and shame were in her rolling eyes.
"Well?"
"Fo' Gawd, Miss Scarlett! We's got ter have a doctah. Ah--Ah--Miss Scarlett, Ah doan know nuthin' 'bout bringin' babies. Maw wouldn' nebber lemme be 'round folkses whut wuz
havin' dem."
All the breath went out of Scarlett's lungs in one gasp of horror before rage swept her.
Prissy made a lunge past her, bent on flight, but Scarlett grabbed her.
"You black liar--what do you mean? You've been saying you knew everything about
birthing babies. What is the truth? Tell me!" She shook her until the kinky head rocked drunkenly.
"Ah's lyin', Miss Scarlett! Ah doan know huccome Ah tell sech a lie. Ah jes' see one baby birthed, an' Maw she lak ter wo' me out fer watchin'."
Scarlett glared at her and Prissy shrank back, trying to pull loose. For a moment her mind refused to accept the truth, but when realization finally came to her that Prissy knew no more about midwifery than she did, anger went over her like a flame. She had never struck a slave in all her life, but now she slapped the black cheek with all the force in her tired arm. Prissy screamed at the top of her voice, more from fright than pain, and began to dance up and down, writhing to break Scarlett's grip.
As she screamed, the moaning from the second floor ceased and a moment later Melanie's
voice, weak and trembling, called: "Scarlett? Is it you? Please come! Please!"
Scarlett dropped Prissy's arm and the wench sank whimpering to the steps. For a moment Scarlett stood still, looking up, listening to the low moaning which had begun again. As she stood there, it seemed as though a yoke descended heavily upon her neck, felt as though a heavy load were harnessed to it, a load she would feel as soon as she took a step.
She tried to think of all the things Mammy and Ellen had done for her when Wade was