“You need to take a deep breath,” I mutter, weaving in and out of traffic as fast as possible without running the risk of being pulled over. Every car we pass with an Uber decal in the window, I glance into the backseat in case Elise is the passenger. “I can’t deal with your hysterics right now.”
“Please know that I’m holding back!”
Another purposeful bang of his head against the window.
“I can’t believe we let her walk out and close the door,” Gabe is saying, though it’s hard to discern whether he’s talking to us or himself. “We should never let her walk out when things are up in the air. She has to stay. She has to hear everything we’re saying. Didn’t we decide that in the escape room? Everyone on the same page.”
Tobias clutches at his chest like he’s been stabbed and howls at the ceiling.
“I take responsibility for that, too, Gabe,” I say, finding it necessary to clear my throat. It is very difficult to remain calm right now, but I can’t lose it when I am the designated stable one of the group. Today, at least. That being said, it’s taking every drop of my willpower not to floor the gas pedal and bellow like a wounded beast at the top of my lungs.
I saw on her face that something was wrong. I saw that she was crumbling and I didn’t properly take control of the situation. Now I’m paying. I’m paying in fear and regret. This woman has completely transformed my world since we met. I’m in love with her. I want her to be a part of every moment of my life. God help me, I want these two shitheads there, too.
Anyone who threatens what we’ve made here is going to regret it. I don’t care if that someone is one of the most influential men in the city—what we have is more powerful.
Finally, I’m off the bridge. Unfortunately, crosstown traffic this close to rush hour is abominably slow and lights seem to be taking forever.
“Okay,” I say, trying unsuccessfully to calm my own nerves. “Unless Elise told someone where she was going, no one knew she was leaving the house besides us. We have no evidence that someone is actively looking for her. I could be having a panic attack for nothing.”
“You’re having a panic attack?” Tobias temporarily stops abusing his cranium against the glass to shift around and face me. “You’re supposed to be the calm one.”
“I’m not calm at all. I’ll be calm when we find her at the Times.”
“When is that going to be, approximately?” Tobias asks. “I have no idea where we are. I barely leave my apartment unless it’s for therapy. This could be Miami for all I know.”
“We’re in Midtown,” Gabe says, still sounding dazed. “Do you guys miss her?”
“Yes,” I say very precisely.
“Yes,” Tobias echoes, his voice a scrape of sound. “Very much.”
It remains dead quiet in the car through the next block.
“All three of us love her, don’t we?” Gabe asks, though he obviously doesn’t expect an answer.
He doesn’t need to. The truth is palpable. My stomach winds up into a knot when I think about her smile, how she listens so intently, how her eyes water when she feels cornered. Her bravery. I have known her for such a short amount of time and yet I can’t picture a future where she isn’t making her mark on every day, every hour, every moment.
“I’m a traditional man. I’ve always imagined myself getting married. Again.” Gabe coughs into his fist. “But I won’t be able to marry Elise. None of us will.”
“God, man. I’m just hoping she talks to me again.” Tobias exhales roughly. “But since we’re on the subject, I’ve done some internetting and…there are commitment ceremonies.”
I watch Gabe sit up straighter in the rearview. “There are?”
“Yes,” I say, trying to keep my voice even. “I checked into it, as well.”
Gabe curses. “I really need to figure out the internet.”
“When that day comes, you’re going to learn a lot more about me,” Tobias says. With a laugh that sounds pained, he asks, “How hard do you think it would be to convince Elise to exchange vows on the beach in a white dress while a violinist plays softly in the background?”
“Next to impossible,” I answer, strings tightening in my chest.
“We’d have to trick her,” Gabe laughs.
We join him. For about five seconds.
Then the car goes silent again. The air around us weighs a thousand pounds.