I didn’t know where I found the energy to obey. I’d sunk so deep into that blissful headspace of submission, of pleasure, of willing helplessness. It was a dimension without fear, without the dread that had hung over me those past few months. It was safe, it was beautiful, it felt so good. My pussy stretched and pulsed around that thick toy as he unwrapped another needle from its clear plastic seal and cleaned it.
“Hold still for me. Turn the vibrator back on.”
My clit was so sensitive that just barely touching the humming head of the vibrator against it made me groan. Holding still was so much harder now. I couldn’t stop shaking, as if my body couldn’t contain the multitude of sensations flooding it. I kept my eyes on his face as he positioned the forceps, and smiled when I saw the barely-tethered excitement flash in his eyes as he held up the needle.
He was monstrous, but he was mine. And I was his, as surely as if he’d already claimed my soul.
I’d spent so many years chasing darkness, reaching out for it, calling to it, and now I’d sunk into it. It had embraced me and I didn’t want it any other way. The darkness was sharp but, God, it was warm. It was terrifying, but it was safe.
The darkness was a demon leaning over me with fire in his eyes, whispering, “You’re mine, baby girl.”
The second needle hurt worse, but it shattered me just the same. My head tipped back, eyes closed, groaning at that brutal sharpness and the tingling, fiery pleasure that flowed through my veins, from my core all the way to the tips of my toes. I dropped the vibrator, the stimulation far more than I could bear. My head was so light, I was sinking so deep.
Leon didn’t let me fall. He was on his knees beside me, arms around me, cradling me against his chest as he lay kisses over my face and whispered, “There’s my girl. Ssh, easy. Easy. Deep breaths, baby girl.”
I realized the music had changed. I recognized it…Cigarettes After Sex…Nothing’s Gonna Hurt You Baby. I floated there, eyes closed, shattered and warm, protected in his arms. I could forget all the danger outside these walls, and let darkness be my shelter here. I could let wickedness be my sanctuary, perversion my therapy, and a monster be my lover.
“I can clean them myself, you know…doesn’t that gross you out?”
I narrowed my eyes at her as I carefully nudged the cotton swab along the bar through her nipple. “I’ve done things for pleasure so disgusting it would make most humans vomit. Cleaning the marks I gave you is far from gross, Rae.”
She smirked as I moved to clean the other bar. I had her sitting at the edge of the large tub, her shirt off, a pair of oversized pajamas on her lower half. “Disgusting things, huh? Like what?” Her dark eyes glittered in that mischievous way that set my brain on fire. That playful curiosity drove me wild, just like it had the first time she’d ever snapped back at me.
I was fucked for this girl. Well and truly fucked.
I knew what that feeling was when she’d slept against me last night, limp and exhausted — the ache in my chest, the pain of it so bitterly sweet as I held her. I couldn’t say many things terrified me, but that did. The way I felt when I saw my metal in her, shining on those luxuriously soft, irresistible breasts, terrified me so deeply it almost stopped my breath.
I wasn’t supposed to feel anything for a human. But here I was, willing to risk life and limb for this little hellfire of a woman.
I set aside the saltwater solution and cotton swabs and kissed her left breast, then the right; then her neck, warm and pulsing with blood; then her face, soft and blushing as she giggled. Her laughter made me growl, it ignited an immediate desire to pin her down and play with her until her giggles turned to screams of pleasure.
“Ah, careful, they’re sore!”
It took every scrap of self-control I had to let her up from the edge of the bathtub, then watch her finish undressing and step into the shower. “Keep the curtain open,” I said, leaning back against the sink. “I want to see you.”
My self-control didn’t hold on much longer. I stripped down, and while the soap was still slick on her skin I fucked her against the wall until she breathlessly cried my name, and damn, my name sounded so good when it came from her mouth. She was bent over with her hands against the tile wall, and I reached around to squeeze her face and demanded, “Say my name again, baby girl. Cry for me.”
She did, and fuck, that was heaven.
I ordered her too much food again, but I liked the way her face lit up when she saw all the breakfast plates delivered. She was midway through a plate of thick Belgian waffles piled with peaches when her phone rang, and her eyes narrowed in concern as she looked at the screen.