“What do you mean?”
“Caroline’s father was very wealthy. We could afford to live anywhere. Manhattan, San Francisco, you name it. But she wanted Spring Brook, so here we are in Spring Brook.” He speaks as if events have spiraled beyond his control. “Don’t get me wrong, Mallory. She’s a good person. She has a big heart. And she would do anything for Teddy’s well-being. But this is not the life I wanted. I never signed on for any of this.”
“Can I get you some more water?”
He shakes his head, like I’m failing to grasp some essential point. “I’m not asking you to take care of me. I’m saying I would take care of you.”
“I understand. And I’ll think about it. But right now we should get you home. Caroline is probably worried.”
Ted is increasingly incoherent—he says something about Seneca Lake and wine country and running away from everything. He manages to stand without my help, then lifts his chinos and buttons them. “We should burn these.”
“Tomorrow,” I tell him. “Let’s burn them tomorrow.”
“But not in the cottage.” He points to the smoke detector on the wall. “All your wiring is knob and tube so it’s very delicate. Very fragile. Don’t fix it yourself. Ask me for help.”
I open the door to the cottage and Ted stumbles outside onto the porch. Somehow he manages to descend the three steps to the lawn without tripping, and then he veers off into the dark, heading toward the big house.
“Good night,” I call after him.
“We’ll see,” he calls back.
I close the door to my cottage and lock it. I spy a crumpled wad of Kleenex on the nightstand beside my bed. I pick it up with a paper towel and shove it deep down to the bottom of my wastebasket. Then I pull off my blankets and strip off my sheets and discover three of my bras mixed up in everything. I don’t know how they ended up in my bed and I don’t want to know. Tomorrow I will put everything in the laundry and I will try to forget this happened.
Since I don’t have any other sheets, I have to spread my bath towels over the mattress and lie down on them. It’s not as uncomfortable as it sounds. All I have to do is close my eyes and I’m transported back to the beautiful castle garden with its gentle waterfalls and sweet-smelling floral archways. Nothing can spoil this night for me—not my argument about the séance with Caroline, and certainly not discovering Ted in my cottage. And before I fall asleep I ask God to forgive me for lying to Adrian. I pray that He’ll help me find the right words to tell him the truth. I pray that Adrian will see past all the horrible things I’ve done—that he’ll see me as the person I am now, not the disaster I used to be.
19
The next morning I get to the big house and find Caroline and Ted dressed for work and sitting in the breakfast nook. Caroline is drinking tea and Ted is sipping black coffee and they’re staring at each other in stony silence. I realize they’re waiting for me.
“Can you join us?” Caroline asks. “Ted has something he’d like to say.”
Ted looks like hell. He’s clearly hungover. The man belongs upstairs in bed. Or down on his knees in the bathroom, hunched over a toilet. “I want to apologize for my behavior last night. It was completely unacceptable and—”
“Ted, it’s fine. I’ve already forgotten about it.”
Caroline shakes her head. “No, Mallory, we’re not going to pretend this didn’t happen. We need to fully acknowledge everything that occurred last night.”
Ted nods and dutifully continues, like he’s reciting some kind of memorized public statement. “My actions were arrogant and disrespectful. I’m ashamed of my behavior, and I’m looking inward to understand why I chose to abuse my privilege.”
“Apology accepted,” I tell them. “You don’t need to say anything else. I’d feel better if we just moved on, okay?”
Ted looks to Caroline, and she shrugs. Fine.
“Thank you for understanding, Mallory. I promise it won’t happen again.”
He stands up and grabs his briefcase and then walks unsteadily toward the foyer. Moments later, I can hear the front door slam, and the sound of his car starting in the driveway.
“He’s afraid you’re going to sue us,” Caroline explains. “Can you please tell me what happened? In your own words?”
“Caroline, I promise you, it was nothing. Last night, I went to Adrian’s house. His parents were having a party. I got home after midnight and Ted was in my cottage. He was drunk. He said you guys had a fight, and that he needed a quiet place to cool off.”