He was right. If Zosa and I managed to get past the threshold, we would disappear into nothing the moment the hotel moved at midnight. We had to void our contracts first.
And that was impossible. But I had to find a way.
I suspected Zosa’s contract was filed in that infinite ledger along with mine and all the others. But I didn’t know how Alastair voided them. Whenever I brought it up, Bel told me that it wasn’t as simple as ripping the parchment in two, that Alastair used powerful, complicated magic. He didn’t know how it worked, or if we could repeat it ourselves.
I wanted to search for something that could help—do something other than feel utterly useless—but Bel told me that Alastair would notice if I even glanced in his direction for too long. I was to keep my head down, while he continued looking for answers and checking on Zosa.
But it wasn’t enough. I was going out of my mind working in the kitchens. I needed to see my sister with my own eyes. “How hard would it be for you to get an aviary key? Let me peek inside?”
“I always thought you were pigheaded, never a complete fool.”
“Zosa is my family. Can’t you understand that?”
Bel flinched and my hand flew to my mouth. It was the wrong thing to say. Bel didn’t remember his family or his home. Though he’d never told me outright, it was obvious he wanted what I still had.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“It’s fine. Drop it.”
“Bel . . .” My heart stuttered. Despite how calculated he was, I’d finally felt like there was something growing between us. Tenuous as it was, it felt different than what I had with Béatrice. Bel knew my secrets. He understood me like no one else inside save for Zosa. Now I had to go and screw it up.
I reached for his hand, but stopped myself. Bel looked at my fingers dangling in the space between us. His brow arched.
What was I doing? My neck grew hot. He’s only a means to escape this place. Don’t lose focus. All that matters is Zosa, I told myself. I let my hand drop to my side.
“Anything else?” he asked after a little while.
“I saw the suminaire, Red, in the kitchens.”
“And?”
“I only glanced at her.”
“You have to pretend she’s a stranger.”
I pictured that teacup full of not-milk. “But the escape game was my fault. Her eye—”
“You didn’t know it at the time. It’s just what happens when a suminaire is demoted.”
Bel had told me weeks ago Alastair used to demote suminaires the same way he did normal workers, until he erased one particular suminaire’s mind too many times and it snapped. In an instant, the magic coming from that poor suminaire’s artéfact magnified tenfold. A handful of normal staff were killed. Since then, Alastair became fearful about accidentally destroying his suminaires, so he stopped removing more of their memories during demotions.
Now, when a suminaire misbehaved, they were allowed to keep their position. Instead of demotion, Yrsa scooped out one of their eyes and dipped it inside her teacup full of not-milk, turning the eye to solid porcelain. A first warning. But what came next was worse.
Bel had witnessed Yrsa crack a porcelain eye once. The suminaire dropped dead a moment later.
“Did Red notice you watching her?” Bel asked.
“You mean when we danced a jig for everyone to see?”
“Just keep your head down,” he said, unamused. “Here.” He pulled out a bundle from his pocket.
“What’s this?” I unwrapped it. It was a pair of lorgnettes along with a small book stamped with a silver compass rose. An atlas. It startled me. Bel brought me something that he didn’t need to . . . because he knew I wanted it. The thought made me smile.
His mouth twitched.
“Thank you. But why—”
“There was gossip about a kitchen maid perusing library books.”
“Oh god.”
“Next time you’re bored, please let me know.” He straightened his jacket to go. “It’s time I get back to work. It’s nearly midnight.”
“Already?”
“First you can’t stand my company, and now you can’t get enough?”
He was teasing me, but I didn’t take his bait because a dead feeling had settled in my chest. “I’m not going to learn anything else tonight, am I?”
“I’m sorry.”
“So I’m supposed to go back to my room alone and wonder if I’ll ever speak with my sister again?”