* * *
—
We found it hard to understand how Thula, with her zeal, could be so bonded to Austin and his sense of resignation. The hearts of women are fickle and easily altered by love, which is why we prayed often for the Spirit to grant our friend wisdom. Before she left, she had promised us that she would write in her letters all there was to write so that we could keep her accountable; thus we were compelled to ask her, after recognizing that Austin was making her into a new creation, if, when the time came, she would leave Austin for Kosawa. If she were to decide to remain in America for the sake of love, we told her, we would accept it. We would rejoice and wish her well. To that she responded:
How could you ever doubt me? If I’m telling you about Austin, it’s not to make you wonder if I’ll return. I tell you so that you may know why I must return even though my heart cries out in protest. Yes, I want to be with him up to the moment when I have just one breath left. I want to lie next to him and cry about Papa and Bongo and a world gone so thoroughly mad I want to rip it apart and free the universe from humans. He wants the world re-created too, but not in the way we seek to do it. He believes in dialogue, in people sharing their stories, hearing others’ stories, enemies gaining new perspectives on each other. I’m tempted to laugh at his na?veté in thinking stories alone can do that. When I told him about your first attack at Gardens, he was aghast that we’d gone in that direction. He and I had a quarrel about it; we didn’t speak for days. I find it hard to discuss anything about the struggle with him. Still, I do, he’s my best friend. But if he doesn’t understand my vision, how can I let him stand by me in the years to come?
Over and over he tells me that what we need is patience. He says His Excellency and his government will sooner or later crumble under the weight of their reckless greed and Pexton will flee with them. It infuriates me when he says it. Patience, be patient. What we need isn’t patience. What we need to do is fight. But he doesn’t believe in hostility; he says every single conflict in the world can be resolved by dialogue. I told him ours hasn’t been—that’s why we’ll fight on.
* * *
—
But how were we to fight on when we’d put down our weapons? we asked her.
By the time of that letter, it had been four years since our agreement with Mr. Fish, and still no percentages were forthcoming. We were not eager to pick up our machetes again, but we could not let them take us for imbeciles. We told Thula that perhaps the time had come for us to revive our late-night visits to Gardens. We needed to remind them that our farms were still producing shriveled crops, our well was still full of toxic water, our children were still breathing poisonous air.
Thula agreed. “It appears keeping a promise means nothing to them,” she wrote.
She did not, however, want us to resume our attacks immediately. She wanted us to wait until after her return, which she was in the process of planning. She wanted to sit down with Sonni and the elders and convince them that while she was determined to engage in dialogue with Pexton, she also believed that we should not wait for Pexton indefinitely—it was important to her that the elders and we were in accord that if Pexton failed to meet our demands, we would reinstate our former tactics. She wanted to explain to the elders that the Restoration Movement would likely at some point move on from Kosawa to another place, and that wouldn’t be unkind of them, it was how these things worked; we had to start planning for the day when we would have little outside support.
We agreed with everything she said. We told her we would wait for her return before reigniting the battle, for we knew that, with her back, our tenacity would grow.
In her next letter, she told us about another idea she had been pondering.
Think about it, Pexton isn’t acting alone. They only have power over us because our government gave them power over us. The government gave them our land. The government sent the soldiers that afternoon. The government hanged our men. If we were to get Pexton to leave, wouldn’t the government return in another form to continue smothering us? Which means that our ultimate enemy is not Pexton, it’s our government. That is not to say we shouldn’t take a stand against Pexton, it only means we need to take a stand against the government too. I know this is going to sound outrageous, you’ll probably think it’s far beyond our capacity, but what if we started a movement to bring down His Excellency’s government? What if we were to send a message to Bézam that we won’t take it anymore?