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Icebreaker(65)

Author:A. L. Graziadei

Nicolette takes a break from cutting up her pancakes to point her fork around the table and say, “How did we go from happy wedding and baby talk to depressing Dad talk?”

“It’s one thing we all got in common,” I say. Bailey curls her lip like she wants to argue some more, but instead she just shakes her head and sips her tea.

As we get closer to finishing breakfast, closer to when four of them have to leave, I can feel it in my chest. This heavy sense of impending loss and grief. The static cage squeezing in around my heart as the words build up behind my teeth. This is the first time we’ve all been together in forever, and the next time won’t be till draft day and Mikayla’s wedding a few months later. After that, who even knows? I don’t want to do it over group chat.

If I don’t do it now, it’ll be on the tip of my tongue—or my fingertips, I guess—till I see them again.

My breathing picks up, heart racing just at the thought of the words coming out of my mouth. And I know they’ll be accepting. I mean, Delilah’s a lesbian and Bailey’s dating two bi guys, for Christ’s sake. But it doesn’t make it any easier to breathe in and say, “Can I tell you guys something?”

I focus on pushing soggy home fries around on my plate so I don’t have to look at them.

“Duh,” Nicolette says.

I think I’m gonna be sick. “I am…” Nova’s knee presses against mine under the table. I look at her out of the corner of my eye. She’s grinning as she sips her coffee. “Bisexual,” I blurt. “I am bisexual. Or maybe pan. I don’t know. Pan fits better, I guess, but bi just sounds better to me. Is that bad? It’s just easier. I don’t know. But yeah. Not straight. So yea—”

Madison’s hand closes on top of mine and I cut my rambling short. I take a few breaths before looking up at them. Bailey’s propping her chin in her hand with this smug twist to her lips. Mikayla and the twins have these small, almost proud smiles on their faces.

But Delilah’s gaping at me, French toast hanging from the fork she holds over her plate. She closes her mouth and sets it down slowly. “How did I not know this? Mickey! Why didn’t you tell me?”

I shrug a shoulder. “Same reason you didn’t till you brought your first girlfriend home.”

“It’s not like it wasn’t obvious with me.”

“But you still didn’t tell.”

Her eyes soften with understanding. She nods a little, and goes back to eating.

Bailey clears her throat before saying, “Sid and Karim would be totally willing if you wanna talk more after this.”

I give her a small nod and an even smaller smile. My breathing’s evened out and my heart’s not pounding anymore. I feel lighter somehow.

“You knew?” Delilah demands. Bailey quirks an eyebrow, holding eye contact while she takes a long sip of her tea.

“Anyone else wanna come out today?” Nicolette says. “Now’s the time to do it. Nova?”

Nova clicks her tongue and sets down her coffee mug. “Sadly, I am still exclusively attracted to guys.”

Nicolette jerks her chin toward me. “Surprised this one didn’t ruin them for you.”

We all laugh, and I’ve never been so grateful to have Delilah and Bailey at the same school as me as I am while watching the rest of them leave. If I didn’t have them standing next to me as everyone else got in the car with Mom and Dad to head to the airport, I might’ve dropped out right then and there and gone with them.

Paul Duggan @duggerfest ? 1d

Caulfield—charismatic asshole

James—socially inept asshole

Cicero—clueless asshole

The Royals top line is just a line of assholes.

Mickey James III @mjames17 ? 6m

Replying to @duggerfest

If calling someone a little shit and pulling them around the ice by their jersey makes someone charismatic, it’s no wonder I’m the socially inept one.

Jaysen Caulfield @jaycaul21 ? 6m

Replying to @duggerfest @mjames17

Congrats, you learned how to use social media. You are now slightly less inept but still just as much of a little shit as before

Mickey James III @mjames17 ? 5m

If you can teach me how to be charismatic maybe I’ll teach you how to lift a puck over a goalie pad

Jaysen Caulfield @jaycaul21 ? 5m

That might be the funniest thing you’ve ever said terzo. @Duggerfest you might wanna amend your labels. James is both the socially inept one and the clueless one

Mickey James III @mjames17 ? 3m

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