“I never had any of this,” Audrey said. “Only the wealth. That’s why I couldn’t imagine this life when the Barretts offered it to me. Especially without Robert. I can barely imagine living here now, but I have no other choice. What I wanted for my son was the life that Alfie and I had at Wellingford Hall. But the war we fought to preserve that life ended up destroying it.” She sat down at the table across from Eve. “And it also made us sisters, Eve. Remember?”
“Yes. . . . Maybe I could tell everyone you’re my sister,” she said with a weak smile.
“And keep living a lie?”
“I don’t know what else to do! It’s like there’s a huge mountain in my path and I don’t know how to climb over it or go around it. I’m thirty-one years old and I’ve already climbed so many mountains that I don’t have the will or the strength to try.”
“You were the one who always kept me climbing, Eve. Even when I wanted to quit.”
“Well, maybe I’m tired of being the strong one.”
“Remember how hard that year was after our mothers died?” Audrey asked. “If anyone had asked us what we hoped for once the war ended, we wouldn’t have known what to say.”
“I couldn’t imagine that it would ever end,” Eve said, running her fingers through her sandy hair. “One by one we watched our dreams being destroyed along with our country. There was no chance to ask ourselves who we were or what we wanted in life. We lived day to day, driving ambulances, picking up broken people, taking them to hospital down pitch-dark roads. Sometimes I lost hope that my life would ever be different.”
“I know. The years when most girls plan and dream of the future were stolen from us. All we knew was to get through each day, doing without all the things that gave us our identity and helped us know we were women.”
Eve gave a mirthless laugh. “Remember that shapeless ATS uniform? Those ridiculous undergarments? We looked like old crones.”
“We had no idea what life would be like when the war ended—when we either won or, God forbid, were forced to surrender. So why dream? Why plan?”
“And then the Americans came,” Eve said with a little smile. “Pearl Harbor was bombed just like England had been. Finally the Americans entered the war. There was a ray of hope at last. I remember feeling glad that the Japanese attacked them—and then hating myself for thinking it.”
“I remember thinking that it truly was a worldwide war now. I pictured that little globe Alfie and I had in our schoolroom and it chilled me to know that nearly every place on the planet felt the war’s effects. It was overwhelming! Like something from the last pages of the Bible.”
“And then the invasion came, remember? Not the Nazi one we’d long dreaded, but the American invasion. All those fresh-faced GIs. Nearly two million of them!”
“One of them was Robert,” Audrey murmured.
“Yes, and one was Louis. They made us remember who we were. They made us feel like women again.”
Audrey could only nod. Not only had Robert made her feel like a woman, but like the woman God created her to be. Where had that woman gone?
17
ENGLAND, FEBRUARY 1943
Eve was eating supper in the mess hall with Audrey when the sergeant major walked in. The woman stood for a moment, gazing around the hall as if searching for someone in particular. Eve groaned. “Oh no. Hide under the table, Audrey. Quick!”
“Why?”
“The Mouse just walked through the door and I think she’s looking for a victim.” Eve scrunched lower in her chair, keeping her head down, even though it probably wouldn’t help if the Mouse was searching for them. Audrey’s glorious amber hair and aristocratic posture set her apart from all the other women.
“She can’t make us drive on our weekend off, can she?” Audrey asked. “We’ve been driving every night for two weeks!”
“She can do whatever she wants. Duck your head, Audrey.”
“Too late. Here she comes.”
The woman strode across the room, shoes squeaking on the linoleum floor. The telltale sound had earned her the nickname Mouse, even though Bull would have better fit her build and personality. Eve looked up in dread as the squeaking halted beside their table.
“I’ve been looking for you two. You have tonight off, right?”
“We did . . . ,” Eve mumbled.
“Yes, ma’am,” Audrey said. “We have the weekend off. For the first time this month, in fact.”