‘I didn’t, um, know that you knew her. Why would you feel guilty?’
‘She’s cleaned for me for nearly two years. Always done a stellar job. I recommended her to three of my friends. Fantastic attitude, works until she’s dripping with sweat… so I should have… I couldn’t have…’
While Pia started weeping again, I mentally went back over the list of cleaning clients that Leanne had provided so I could let them know she was in hospital. She visited nine houses from Monday to Friday with varying frequency, as well as Hatherstone Hall. There had been a mixed response, from disinterest to annoyance to Ginger, who ran the hall, expressing a gush of relief that the recent drop in standards wasn’t down to Leanne growing sloppy or lazy.
‘You weren’t on the list Leanne gave me. Otherwise I’d have called to let you know.’
Pia lowered her tissue, taking in a shuddery breath. ‘That’s because I let her go.’
‘Ah.’
‘She’s always been brilliant, like I said. Over the past few months I noticed she was taking longer to complete the work, and then things started not getting done. One day I arrived home early and found her sprawled on the spare bed! When I asked what was going on, she denied any problem, slurring her speech and swaying all over the place. I assumed she’d been drinking. And, given the quality of her work, that it wasn’t the first time. It was one in the afternoon!’
I took a slow, deep breath. ‘Did you call children’s services?’
My heart had time for several painful, pounding thumps before she replied. ‘I was worried for Joan. I knew she didn’t have anyone else.’
‘You had no proof that she was drunk.’
‘Well, something was clearly not right.’
‘But still – as if Leanne didn’t have enough problems! She was terrified that her daughter might be taken from her. You have children; can you possibly imagine what that was like?’
‘My dear, I’ve worked as a family solicitor since before you were born. I don’t have to imagine. I also know all too well what it could have been like for Joan, with no one to help her.’
‘You could have asked me.’ A bubble of hot rage began expanding in my stomach, squeezing up against my diaphragm. ‘I’ve been looking after Joan most evenings after school and on Saturdays.’
‘And you were sure that nothing was wrong? That Leanne was a capable mother, there was nothing of concern going on?’
The bubble popped.
Pia studied my sudden deflation, before pulling out a hardbacked notebook and pen.
‘Shall we sort some rotas?’
‘Rotas?’
‘I’ve made a start with meals, taking Joan to visit her mother – trusted, DBS-checked people only, but hopefully we won’t need that one for long. Cleaning, washing, shopping. Is there anything else you need? Would it be useful to have some people walk Nesbit?’
‘I don’t… I’m not sure what… are you making rotas for people to help me?’
‘Well, of course. You’re the one doing all the work.’
‘Listen, that’s very kind of you, and I do appreciate it, but I really don’t need any help. I’m the one helping Leanne. Once she’s discharged, I suppose someone else could chip in with some meals for her, but I’m fine.’
Pia actually laughed. She tried to hide it, but her face was like a pane of glass. ‘My dear, everyone needs help. That’s how life works.’
‘I’m actually kind of trying to manage without, at the moment. It’s complicated – family history, past issues, that sort of thing, but it’s important that I see this through on my own.’
‘Ollie, I have just been inside your kitchen. I’ve never drunk black tea in my life, but when I tried to add milk it plopped out in a perfect cube. Your trousers are on inside out. I’m pretty sure your dog has eaten a packet of crackers and vomited it back up again. You need help. We all need help, all the time. That’s why I pay for a cleaner and have just spent the week driving my grandchildren about. But sometimes, we need more help than others. This is one of those times.’
I shook my head. I had spent too many years being organised and bossed about and told that I couldn’t manage on my own, and all those memories were on red alert, determined not to let this pushy woman push her way into my home and my life and start controlling it.
Pia narrowed one eye. ‘I heard that social services are assessing the best options for Joan. Do you think you can convince them that you can provide her with the best possible care, like this? Insisting that you do it on your own?’