“Those are some deep thoughts you got swirling around.”
I blinked, realizing I’d been standing at the sink, holding the same dish for several minutes. “Sorry, just sort of spaced out.”
“You look tired, punkin’。” He’d moved to the kitchen table and polished off the cider he’d brought with him. The fact that he could see my dark circles from there made my already suffering self-esteem deflate like a balloon, but faster. More like a whoopie cushion.
To complete the self-deprecating image I’d mentally crafted of my self-esteem’s death, I blew a long, drawn-out raspberry. I threw myself in the chair across from him, waving my hand dismissively. “That’s just what every woman wants to hear.”
He didn’t even bat an eye. He knew me too well to know when I was trying to brush off a subject. “You know what I meant. You’re working too much, Madison.”
“I’m fi—”
“Don’t bother saying you’re fine. We all know you’re doing too much when you don’t need to.” Hand it to my mother to enter a conversation with a flourish.
I looked up to see Beth Hartland standing in the hallway, giving me a mock glare. But even the severe expression couldn’t dull her beauty. With a heart-shaped face and high cheekbones, accented by her light brown straight bob, she had the type of face that instantly made you love her.
She’d been trying to convince me to take money from them for a while now. I knew they just wanted to help and didn’t care about the money, but I did. The entire idea stung.
I was paying my bills and keeping us fed. There was no reason, other than lowering the number of hours I worked, for me to accept money from them. I wasn’t so stubborn that I wouldn’t take money if I suddenly lost my jobs and couldn’t make ends meet, but thankfully, I wasn’t at that point.
“How’s Brenden?” I asked, aware my obvious turn of conversation wasn’t fooling anyone.
“Pull back a little, Madison. Let yourself focus on finishing school. It’s not healthy for you to keep doing what you’re doing. You’ve been through enough—”
I held up my hand, cutting her off when I locked eyes with the boy standing behind her. His brows were drawn down in a frown and his lips were pursed.
“Hey, bud, grandma and grandpa are going to be heading out soon, why don’t you go ahead and hop in the shower before I whoop your butt at racing tonight.”
He shuffled his feet, glancing between us, “Yeah, all right.”
Watching him walk away, I made eye contact with my mom. I knew she wouldn’t say anything else on the matter with him around. She was firm and opinionated when it was just us, but she’d never undermine or lecture me in front of Jamie.
“I know you love us, Mama. I love you too. But we’re doing okay. We’re actually pretty happy here. It’s roomier and the neighbors are quiet.” Although they might not say the same about me, I thought.
She gave me a sad smile, coming up to kiss me on the head.
“So really, how’s Brenden doing?” I asked, standing and walking them toward the door.
“He’s good. He snagged a few more gigs and is feeling pretty good. He did the sound for an event on some sports station, you’ll have to ask him about it.”
“Dang, that’s cool,” I said, honestly believing that but knowing I wouldn’t call him. I loved my brother, and I applauded how hard he’d worked for his dream job, but we just weren’t super close.
Brenden was three years older than me and living in Los Angeles. He’d gone to school for film, and as soon as he’d graduated, he’d promptly moved to the west coast to work his way up. He hadn’t made it big yet, but he’d made several connections, and I was proud of him.