“This is really wonderful, Dr. Cannon,” Carl said.
“So you’re a retired physician?” I asked him.
“Oh, yes. Practiced medicine for fifty years. Now, you know, I was the family doctor for the Roberts family when Senator Roberts, that is, Jasper’s father, was alive. I was considered the best doctor in Nashville, in the whole state of Tennessee.”
“Okay,” I said, not sure what else to say.
“I very much value my relationship with the Roberts family,” he said. “And they, of course, value my discretion.”
This all sounded creepy, like it had to be about venereal diseases, so I just kept saying “Okay” and hoping for the best.
“But these children!” he said, his voice booming. “How interesting. Now, as I’m sure Carl told you, I’m not only a doctor of medicine.”
“He did not tell me,” I replied, looking at Carl, who hadn’t even taken off his sunglasses yet.
“I am also a doctor of the paranormal, which is its own kind of science, I can assure you. And, wouldn’t you know it, I have done quite a bit of research on spontaneous human combustion.”
“Is that so?” I said, ready to scream.
“But medicine and the paranormal, while equally important, are two different things. So we keep them separate, or at least I do. Let me check these children out. Hop up, one at a time, on this table.”
Roland hopped up. The doctor took his temperature, thank god reaching into a little black bag with modern instruments, and then took his blood pressure and checked his eyes and ears and throat. He did the same for Bessie, who looked right at me the entire time, trying to keep herself calm. But the doctor was careful, mindful of the children. He wasn’t invasive. He simply observed them and made notes.
“This is all fine and good,” he said. “They’re in perfect health, of course. I could tell by looking at them that this would be the case.”
“That’s wonderful, Dr. Cannon,” Carl said.
“Is that it?” I asked.
“Well, from what I understand, what Jasper has told me, you children catch on fire, is that right?”
The kids looked at me, and I gave them a thumbs-up sign and so they nodded in agreement.
“That is fascinating. I wish I could see that, but, no, I understand that’s not a good idea. And you are unharmed?”
The kids again nodded.
“It’s interesting because in the clear cases of spontaneous human combustion, well, the afflicted person typically dies from the flames. Or the smoke. One or the other. This is not, I believe, as straightforward as that. And also different from those cases, I understand that you can sense the arrival of the combustion? Would that be correct?”
“Yes,” Bessie admitted.
“Where, sweetie?” he asked.
“Where?” Bessie replied, confused.
“In your head? Your stomach? Your heart?”
Bessie looked at Roland, who then nodded, their little silent communication. “It kind of starts in our chest and then moves outward, like to our arms and legs and head.”
“Yes, that makes sense. A kind of radiating heat. Interesting, interesting,” the doctor said, making some more notes. “This is all very fantastical. I mean, the children combust, but are unharmed. It’s most unusual. But we can try to be scientific, to adhere to medical truths.”
“That would be perfect,” Carl assured the doctor.
“My initial thoughts have to do with ketosis. Do you know what that is?” he asked the children, who shook their heads. I was shaking my head, too, without realizing it. Carl, of course, was nodding. Of course he knew.
“It’s just a natural metabolic process that happens in your body. If you don’t have enough glucose in your body for energy, your body starts to burn fat. Like a candle, perhaps, if that helps? And so, some people say this is good and some people say that it can be bad. I’m not interested in that, because I think your case might exist outside those worries. But, if you could create a diet that avoided ketosis, then, and this is only a theory, you might prevent the body from so easily creating a kind of internal combustion. Does that make sense?”
“I suppose it does, Dr. Cannon,” Carl replied.
“Can we eat ice cream?” Roland asked.
“Well, that is high fat, but there’s sugar, so I think that would be okay,” Dr. Cannon replied. He tore off a piece of paper and handed it to Carl, who pocketed it.
“It’s simple,” Dr. Cannon said. “You might already be doing it without knowing it, which of course would mean this entire visit was useless. I’m afraid I can’t offer much more than that while maintaining such strict protocols for privacy, without much more testing.”