She wanted it too. That sounds so gross and rapey it takes all my willpower to keep listening to this deranged story.
But I can抰 cut him off.
Not when it抯 the only thing keeping me alive.
揥e stayed in touch after they went home to the mainland. We wrote old-school letters back and forth constantly. We texted. Shit, some nights, Cole would lie there in bed with her, dumb and oblivious. She抎 be up until dawn talking to me.?He grins like he抯 so proud of it.
I try not to gag, wishing I could punch him.
He flicks ash on the floor before continuing. 揥hen we could arrange it, we抎 meet up in swanky hotels and resorts on her wellness retreats. Sure, we fucked like rabbits, but it was more, Eliza. We mapped out a future.?He smiles bitterly. 揅ole thought she was frigid? Fuck that. She was an ice queen for him. And he paid so little attention to his wife, he had no clue. That last trip, it was obvious there was nothing between them. She all but hated him. He saw her as a burden梐 bitchy, overstressed nuisance who just happened to live with him.?
揅ole??I can抰 see it.
That抯 not the man I know.
It抯 Troy抯 warped version of the truth.
揧eah, yeah, I know.?He nods in agreement when I haven抰 said a word. 揟he jackass didn抰 know what he had. But I never meant for our talk that night to get so heated. I didn抰棓
He stops, flinging a look at me that抯 all murderous suspicion again.
揟alk? What talk, Troy??
揂w, fuck.?His face falls. 揑 gave Aster an ultimatum. I told her to leave Cole for me梠r else I was ending it. I was sick of the sneaking around, playing second fiddle, getting paid by a dude who kept my woman on a leash. She wouldn抰 leave him…？
I lean forward slightly, feigning interest in this horror story.
揂nd…and when I told her it was over on the beach, she screamed. She said she didn抰 care if he knew because he抎 never leave her because of Destiny. And she refused to do it, too. So she said it抎 be fine if Cole knew about us. Hell, it抯 like she wanted him to know. As if the three of us could just go along our merry, fucked up little way. She didn抰 care that I抎 lose my job. She came from money and she didn抰 fucking get it.?
I shiver.
揥hat did you do??
揑fuckingpanicked, okay??It comes out like one rushed, awful word. 揑 didn抰 want to be caught on the beach with my boss?wife, but I didn抰 mean to grab her. She pushed me first, tripped me over a rock. I fell in the sand. She wouldn抰 stop yelling梥he just wouldn抰 shut the fuck up,?he growls, staring at the glowing end of his cigarette. 揝till. I only wanted to drag her into the water to cool her off. Make her stop kicking. I damn sure didn抰 mean to hold her under that long. I just wanted her to be quiet. I…I lost control.?
揌oly shit. You drowned her.?
Whoops. It抯 too late to take back my words.
He looks at me like he抯 about to use that gun.
揥ait, I mean, are you sure you drowned her, though? I heard they found her shoes on the beach, but they thought she could抳e gone off a cliff, right??
He gives me a smile that scars my soul. 揟hat was me. I dragged her up the hiking trail and flung her back down to make it look like an accident. The rain that morning washed away the footprints.?
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
I抦 going to pass out.
He dragged a dead woman up a cliff to throw her back into the ocean, and he抯 proud of it.
But his face contorts back into the angry, sad expression he抯 worn all night.
揑t was ruled an accident. Whenever anybody doubted it, I had the suicide theory to fall back on. For ten goddamn years, it worked梪ntil you popped up. You made Destiny go pawing through her mom抯 things棓
揥hat? Troy, no. I didn抰 tell her to look for anything棓
揘o? She didn抰 bother until you showed up.?
I inhale sharply. 揝he hadn抰 been back to Hawaii before then, remember? That was all her, trying to make peace with what happened…？
I抦 not sure why I抦 still reasoning with a rabid dog.
He balls his fists up and swings them back and forth at his sides before pounding on the ship抯 cabin several times. The noise reverberates through the night.
I wince.
揂re you that stupid, witch? Just you being there made her more curious about the mother she抎 lost. I kept everything under wraps for years, and now it抯 spilling everywhere.?He folds his arms over his chest. 揃ut it won抰。 It can抰。 Just as soon as I get rid of you and your mouth, I抦 back to square one. Just another well-paid nobody who doesn抰 matter. If Cole forgets I exist in his grief, all the better.?
I stare right through him.
揝till a goddamned shame about the girl. I never meant for those guys to hurt her…？He makes a frustrated sound, shaking his head.