She took risks, but not outrageous ones.
In all the time I knew her, that nighttime death swim didn抰 seem like something Aster would ever do.
She was there for a reason, but why?
Did she take her own life after all?
Was it part of some fucked up energy cleaning ritual she read about?
I don抰 know.
There抯 a hole in her final chapter and a yawning chasm in my life.
If she took her life, that抯 partly on me. I couldn抰 give her a happy home.
Everything I did to support her was never enough.
The sex was fine梬hen it happened at all in the last few years梐nd once Destiny came into the picture, I liked watching them together. They had their good moments between her storms.
If only we抎 had a connection beyond entangled finances and raising a daughter together.
Deep down, I think she craved that connection, the kind of love Hollywood serves up to the masses. She was a romantic at heart.
A romantic who found her way into a goddamned arranged marriage.
Her parents owned a major shipping company, making coffee cheaper to import to North America.
My parents never asked me what I loved about her梠r even if we needed more time together before I agreed to a life with her.
For our families, it was business.
My folks were too excited about the soaring increase to their net worth and status, plus the prospect of new investments. Hers were no better.
At the engagement party, her father never referred to me as 搒on.?He called me a coffee prince.
To him, she was a bargaining chip, an expendable thing to secure more clout and money and connections.
Is that what ended her life? Being locked into this dreary disappointment she could never walk away from? Being stuck with me?
My gut churns, and I wonder for the ten thousandth time if I抦 the reason why she抯 gone.
Of course, the official reports said otherwise.
The local police chief settled on a tragic accident within days and never looked back. The detectives always frowned on the suicide theory, though it was possible.
My fist slaps the ground next to me so hard it vibrates up my arm.
Fuck it.
Waiting around for the first heavy beads of rain to slap my neck isn抰 doing me any favors.
The rain thickens, but I抦 back inside the house before it starts pouring.
With everyone in their rooms or out sightseeing, it抯 eerily quiet.
I gaze around the family room, full of priceless antiques and old mementos Aster bought on this trip or that over a decade ago.
I never asked the staff to change anything during our absence.
Maybe that抯 the problem.
Everything抯 left in place like a depressing time capsule. Aster抯 presence is still alive, frozen in her bygone style.
My heart sinks and I huff out a disgusted snort.
Even in paradise with unlimited money, I couldn抰 keep her happy.
Our marriage was atrociously shallow.
We looked good together. We made people jealous.
I brought a beautiful woman who was a billionaire in her own right to every business function I had, and we had a passable physical connection.
It just never went further.
It was never love.
It was never what she wanted梐nd then her life ended.
As horribly as it is, I抣l always be grateful for one thing.
Destiny.
Whenever anyone asks梬hich they didn抰 until Troy stuck his nose in things梥he抯 also my excuse. I抳e never dated again because it would be hard on my daughter.
No matter how she抎 deny it, it抯 true. Imagine seeing your mother抯 body washed up on the beach and then watching your father start a new life.
I could never protect my family and keep it whole.
I couldn抰 give Aster the life she craved.
Who the fuck knows if I could ever make any woman truly happy.
Especially women who are already intimately involved in my work life and up in my face. An unworkable polar opposite, regardless of whether or not she aches for me like I do for her.
揅ole??
Katelyn抯 voice startles me. I whip around, nearly knocking a tall antique vase off a mantle as I do. I catch the bastard thing梛ust in time梐nd place it back where it belongs.
揝orry. I was just梖uck,?I stammer, thrown off my game.
She nods, offering a knowing smile.
揟his is the first time you抳e been back here, isn抰 it??
I抦 still rattled, though I抦 not sure it抯 visible to anyone but me.
I hope it isn抰。
I sit down on the couch, safely away from any priceless artifacts.
揧ou know it is,?I mutter.
揑 heard Destiny doesn抰 want to go to the beach,?she says quietly. 揃etween a teenager who loves sea creatures so much she avoids the ocean, and you staring into the void, I put two and two together. If this is hard, Mr. Lancaster…it抯 okay. Don抰 feel embarrassed.?She smiles sadly. 揑 have to let you know, I was in the hall and overheard you and Troy talking…？