Mirabel sighs, which means frustrated, and types, “Safety in.”
“Two is not a number,” Mab says.
“Lie,” I say because two is a number.
“You know what I mean,” Mab says.
“Lie,” I say.
Mab turns to me. “She thinks River’s vulnerable alone, but with me by his side, surely we can take them.”
“Who can you take?” I ask.
“Exactly,” Mab says.
Which does not answer my question so in case she is not in a question-answering mood, I decide to skip right to the important one. “His face is sad and hurt and bleeding, One. Why would not you help him?”
“It’s complicated.” She looks confused, but I do not know why she would be. “You know?”
“No,” Mirabel’s Voice and I say at the same time.
“He says he can’t stop thinking about me. He writes me notes in class. He’s always looking at me.”
Now it is my turn to sound confused because I am confused. “Why does that mean you do not want to help him?”
“He’s evil,” Mab says.
“It is more accurate to say his family is evil,” I correct.
“And he said he was going to find some proof or something,” Mab says, “something we can use.”
Mirabel’s hand flips out, palm up, which means So what? which is a good question.
“So if he does … I don’t know…” Mab says. “I want him to do it because it’s the right thing to do, not because he likes me.”
“Why does it matter why he does it if he does it?” I ask.
“Because otherwise that makes me the jerk.” Mab pulls the sleeves of her hoodie down over both of her hands as if she is cold. “Otherwise, I used him and manipulated his feelings to get what I want.”
I consider this. “That is bad,” I say. “But it is not as bad as letting him get beat up.”
“I’m not letting him.” She waves her hands around but her hands are all tucked in so she waves her sleeves around instead.
“Maybe his family is evil,” I say, “but ours is not.”
Mirabel points at me which means I am correct. “Right thing to do,” her Voice says.
“According to who?” Mab asks, but I do not know why since she knows who Mirabel’s Voice speaks for.
Mirabel holds up her hand with her fingers out wide. Five. Two plus Three. She means according to her and according to me.
Mab’s sleeves flop into a shrug. “Who died and put you in charge?” she says, but then she stops saying anything because she does not need to be in a question-answering mood for us all to hear the answer to that question in our heads anyway. She tucks her sleeves under her armpits. “Sorry,” she says. She does not mean because she does not want to help River. She does not mean because he is getting beat up. She means because she accidentally said that hard, sad thing, and it made everyone feel bad.
“It is okay,” I say so she will not feel worse.
But Mirabel is typing. “I know how you can make it up to me.”
Three
I spend a lot of time listening. As a result, I might be the world’s leading expert on annoying conversational tics. The list of irritatingly misapplied clichés people utter would take me more hours to type out than I have left to live, but near the top is the conversational gambit “There are two kinds of people in this world…” There are two kinds of people in this world: the ones who split the world into two kinds of people, and the ones who know that’s reductive and conversationally lazy.
With this exception: There are two kinds of people in this world. People who can expect to, strive to, feel entitled to be happy. And people who cannot.
The rest of the dichotomies are meaningless beside that one. Look through history for the latter. Look around your town or city. You will find us everywhere. We are legion.
Of course, everyone’s unhappy sometimes. But some people’s barriers to happiness are considered surmountable. They resolve to get in shape, find a therapist, make time for family, read more, go back to school, save money. We advise them, if they are our friends or our family, to find a new job, go to yoga, quit drinking, move out, try online dating, hire a personal stylist, buy a bigger house. You deserve it, we say. Put yourself first for a change. You be you.
Whereas some people are unhappy and that’s okay with us. It seems unreasonable, in fact, that they should expect to be anything else.
Mab should fall in love. She should have friends, adventures, and a family of her own （by which no one means me, never mind I share a significant percentage of her DNA, her home and history, every single blood relation, and a onetime womb）。 We all agree: Mab should leave Bourne for limitless horizons. Mab should have joy, excitement, aspirations she strives for then accomplishes with much fanfare and personal gratification. Mab will go forth and be loved and fulfilled. Happy.