"I'm afraid if I start I shall never stop."
He cast a glance at the horizon, where the sickle moon hung low and rising. "It's nearly winter, and the nights are long, mo duinne" He leaned across the fence, reaching and I stepped into his arms, feeling the heat of his body and the beat of his heart.
"I love you."
* * *
32
Hard Labor
A few days later, near sunset, I was on the hill behind the house, digging up the tubers of a small patch of corydalis I had found. Hearing the rustle of footsteps approaching through the grass, I turned, expecting to see Jenny or Mrs. Crook come to call me to supper. Instead it was Jamie, hair spiked with dampness from his predinner ablutions, still in his shirt, knotted together between his legs for working in the fields. He came up behind me and put his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder. Together we watched the sun sinking behind the pines, robed in gold and purple glory. The landscape faded quietly around us, but we stayed where we were, wrapped in contentment. Finally, as it began to grow dark, I could hear Jenny calling from the house below.
"We'd better go in," I said, reluctantly stirring.
"Mmm." Jamie didn't move, but merely tightened his hold, still gazing into the deepening shadows, as though trying to fix each stone and blade of grass in memory.
I turned to him and slipped my arms around his neck.
"What is it?" I asked quietly. "Must we leave soon?" My heart sank at the prospect of leaving Lallybroch, but I knew that it was dangerous for us to stay too much longer; another visit from the redcoats could happen at any time, with much more sinister results.
"Aye. Tomorrow, or the day after, at latest. There are English at Knockchoilum; it's twenty miles from here, but that's only two days' ride in fine weather." I started to slither off the fence, but Jamie slid an arm under my knees and lifted me, holding me against his chest.
I could feel the heat of the sun still in his skin, and smell the warm dusty scent of sweat and oat grass. He had been helping with the last of the harvesting, and the smell reminded me of a supper the week before, when I knew that Jenny, always friendly and polite, had finally accepted me fully as a member of the family.
Harvesting was grueling work, and Ian and Jamie were often nodding by the end of supper. On one occasion, I had left the table to fetch a brose pudding for dessert, and returned to find both of them sound asleep, and Jenny laughing quietly to herself amid the remains of supper. Ian lay slumped in his chair, chin resting on his chest, breathing heavily. Jamie had laid his cheek on his folded arms and sprawled forward across the table, snoring peacefully between the platter and the peppermill.
Jenny took the pudding from me and served us both, shaking her head at the slumbering men.
"They were yawning so much I wondered, ye know," she said, "what would happen if I stopped talking. So I kept quiet, and sure enough, two minutes later they were out, the both of them." She smoothed Ian's hair tenderly off his forehead.
"That's why there're so few babies born in July here," she said, with a wicked cock of the eyebrow at me. "The men can't keep awake long enough in November to start one." It was true enough, and I laughed. Jamie stirred and snorted next to me, and I laid a hand on the back of his neck to soothe him. His lips curved at once in a soft, reflexive smile, then relaxed into sleep once more.
Jenny, watching him, said, "That's funny, that is. I've not seen him do that since he was quite small."
"Do what?"
She nodded. "Smile in his sleep. He used always to do it, if ye came by and petted him in his cradle, or even later, in his trundle. Sometimes Mother and I would take it in turns to stroke his head and see could we make him smile; he always would."
"That's odd, isn't it?" I experimented, running a hand gently down the back of his head and neck. Sure enough, I was rewarded at once by a singularly sweet smile that lingered for a moment before the lines of his face relaxed once more into the rather stern expression he presented when asleep.
"I wonder why he does that," I said, watching him in fascination. Jenny shrugged and grinned at me.
"I imagine it means he's happy."
In the event, we did not leave next day. In the middle of the night, I was wakened by low conversation in the room. Rolling over, I saw Ian bending over the bed, holding a candle.
"The babe's on its way," said Jamie, seeing me awake. He sat up, yawning. "A bit early, Ian?"
"Ye never know. Small Jamie was late. Better early than late, I reckon." Ian's smile was quick and nervous.