We started eating.
“This is so good,” Gabby said, moaning.
It was good. I really should have let him make me breakfast sooner. Wow.
I was beginning to think maybe I should start taking Daniel up on more of his offers. So far he hadn’t disappointed me—in anything.
I heard a creak in the foyer, and Hunter came in. The front door must have been ajar. He trotted over to the table with a plush toy in his mouth and put his face in my lap.
I smiled. “Hey there.”
I wiped my mouth with a napkin and reached down to pet his head.
Then the plush toy moved.
“Oh, my God!” I screamed, pushing away from the table.
I stared at the thing in his jaws in horror. “He…he has a squirrel!”
Gabby and Jessica practically fell over backward getting up. Daniel must have heard the noise, because he came running in from the kitchen.
Hunter backed into the mouth of the dining room, blinking at us innocently, like he didn’t know what the big deal was.
The thing hung limp from his mouth. Then the tail twitched. Oh no, it was playing dead.
Daniel put his hands out. “Hunter…don’t move.”
I swallowed, my back pressed against the buffet. “Maybe you can get him to go outside?” I whispered.
Daniel nodded. “Good idea,” he said, his voice low.
He started slowly for the front door.
The squirrel began wiggling—Hunter flung it in the air.
Everyone shrieked.
He caught it again like a kid casually tossing a baseball and then shook it around until his ear was inside out, and then he went back to blinking at us.
We were all holding our breath, hostage.
Daniel got all the way to the foyer. He opened the door wide and pointed. “Hunter, out.”
Hunter looked at him, confused. Then he dipped his head and very gently placed the animal at Daniel’s feet. It immediately sprang to life and darted under the dining room table.
Complete chaos.
Screaming, chairs knocking over, broken glass.
Gabby, who had sat at the end against the wall and who was now effectively trapped by fallen chairs, climbed the table and scrambled on her hands and knees over plates of food to escape.
Hunter smiled around at the activity, looking proud of himself.
We burst outside, leaving Daniel and his dog in the house.
When we got out on the lawn, we stood there gasping. Jessica was clutching the front of her shirt like she was having a heart attack and Gabby had an entire piece of French toast stuck to her boob from the table army-crawl. It began to peel off, slowly, and then it landed on the grass with a plop.
Breathing hard, we stared at it sitting there.
And then we started to laugh.
Uncontrollable, soul-releasing laughter.
We were laughing so hard when Daniel came outside a few minutes later to release the thing, we were crying.
Hunter bounded down the stairs and bounced among us, tail wagging. He let out a long roooooooooo! Then he ate the French toast.
I had to wipe tears off my cheeks.
Daniel came over to us, looking apologetic. “I’m sorry. He’s got a soft mouth,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s good for a hunting dog. Means they won’t maul the birds they retrieve. It also means they don’t kill the things they catch…”
Jessica howled. I don’t think I’d ever heard her laugh so hard. She was always so serious.
Daniel put a thumb over his shoulder. “I can replate everything if you just give me a few minutes,” he said, looking embarrassed.
Jessica nodded, wiping under her eyes. “Please do.”
When Daniel went back into the house, Gabby shook her head. “This place is so getting one star. What a shit show.” She laughed.
I sobered instantly. “What? You can’t give it one star.”
Jessica shook her head, still tittering. “I’m pretty sure live rodents at breakfast deserve one star, Ali.”
“It was an accident,” I said.
“Uh, that dog shouldn’t be around people,” Gabby said. “He’s not trained.”
“He’s a rescue. He’s still learning.”
Gabby wrinkled her forehead. “How do you know?”
“The guy told me. Seriously. Do not give this place one star. You’ll hurt his business.”
Gabby scoffed. “So, like, an entire squirrel at breakfast deserves what? Some rave review?”
I shook my head. “No. You don’t have to lie. Just don’t rate it at all.”
She crossed her arms. “If I treated patients the way this guy runs this B & B, I’d be sued for malpractice.”