“Yeah, well. I know about that,” I said quietly.
She looked over at me. “Your boyfriend hit you?”
“He was emotionally abusive. He still is.”
She shook her head. “But…but you’re so smart…”
I scoffed. As if smart has anything to do with it.
I dragged a loose hair on my cheek with a finger and stared out into the street. “I saw this documentary on a tsunami once,” I said. “When it’s coming, it pulls the water away from the beach. Pulls it lower than sea level so the ocean floor is exposed. You can see all the sand and shells and coral, so people go in to look at it. And then the tidal wave comes, and it’s too late to run. It already has you.”
I looked her in the eye. “They lure you in. They make you feel like you’re the best thing to ever happen to them, like you’re the most special woman in the world—like you’re seeing something rare. But that’s the trap. It’s how they get you close enough to drown you. And Liz? Nobody can save you until you’re ready to save yourself.”
Chapter 28
Daniel
I waited for her on the porch. When her headlights turned in to the driveway, I jogged down the steps to meet her.
She looked exhausted as she climbed out of the car in the light of the flood lamp.
“She’s home,” she said, standing with me in front of her car. The engine ticked and heat came off the grille, radiating into my legs. “We sat on the curb until she was calm enough to go back inside. She let me take some pictures of the injuries, but she still won’t let me call the police.”
I reached out and put a hand on her arm. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” She hugged her arms around herself. “Daniel, we need to talk.”
My stomach dropped.
“Okay. About what?”
“Let’s go inside. Talk in your room.”
I followed her up the spiral staircase to my loft, my heart pounding. This wasn’t good. I knew it wasn’t good. Nothing good ever comes out of “we need to talk.”
When we got inside, she sat on the bed, and I took the spot next to her. “What’s wrong?” I asked.
It took her a moment to begin. “Daniel, when we started this, it was just a sex thing for me.”
I waited. It looked like she was struggling.
“That’s not what this is for me anymore.”
I would have smiled at this except she looked so serious.
She licked her lips. “Is this still just a sex thing for you?”
I shook my head. “No. Definitely not.”
She held my eyes, but she didn’t smile. My mouth was dry. I didn’t like where this was going.
“Daniel, I came here today planning to tell you that I can’t come see you anymore.”
My heart plummeted. No…
“But I can’t do it. So I need to be really honest with you so you can have the final say in what’s going to happen.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
“I’m applying for a new job. If I get it, I’ll be working eighty hours a week. I’m already not in the greatest place to have any kind of relationship. If I get this job, it’ll be worse. And even if I don’t get the job, I’m not sure continuing to see each other is a good idea for either of us.”
I shook my head. “Why?”
She looked away from me. “I don’t see us having a future.” Her eyes came back to mine.
My heart cracked.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “But I have to be honest with you about that. And that’s a problem because I’m starting to have feelings for you. So my instinct is to break things off because that’s what’s fair to you—”
“Why don’t you let me decide what’s fair for me?” I said.
She sucked her lips together. “Daniel, if we keep seeing each other, it will be temporary. It won’t lead anywhere, and it won’t last.”
“I don’t care.”
I said it before I could even think about it. But it was true. I didn’t care. If the choice was her walking out of my life tonight and never seeing her again, or getting more time with her, no matter how short that time might be, I wanted the time. I needed it.
She studied my face, and I knew she was deciding for me anyway, even though she’d given me the choice.
“Look,” I said. “I’m a big boy. And I acknowledge and appreciate everything you’re telling me. But I’d like to keep seeing you.”