If only I could run faster.
“Hello, Kayla. It’s lovely to meet you. I’m Claire.”
I stand in the open doorway looking at Fiona’s sister and thinking I must be seeing double. They look exactly alike, right down to the dimples in their cheeks. Same short gray hair, same bright blue eyes, same stout legs and cheerful smile.
They’re so similar, it’s eerie. If Fiona was sick one day and sent Claire to clean the house in her place, I’d never know it. The only difference is that Claire’s carrying a black duffel bag and Fiona has an umbrella.
“Nice to meet you, too. Please, come in.”
I stand aside to let the pair enter the foyer, then shut the door against the blustery evening. “You didn’t tell me you had a twin, Fiona.”
She drops her dripping umbrella into the stand next to the console table and smiles. “We’re not twins.”
“You could’ve fooled me.”
Claire pats her hair. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’m much prettier than she is.”
They share a fond glance, then remove their matching blue wool overcoats in moves that look synchronized. While Fiona takes both coats and hangs them in the hall closet, Claire turns to me and looks me curiously up and down.
“What?” I ask nervously, wondering if I have stains on my shirt or spinach in my teeth.
Her smile is kind. “Fiona has told me so much about you, I already feel as if we’re old friends.”
“Oh. Well, I could use a few friends right now, to be honest. My life is pretty chaotic.”
She chuckles. “Don’t worry, my dear. You’re in good hands. I’ve been communicating with spirits since I was four years old, so we’ll see what this one wants and have her on her way in no time.”
Bypassing my shock that this poor woman has been carrying on conversations with dead people her entire life, I say, “Great. Except the spirits haunting me are male.” My laugh is nervous. “I can’t believe I just said that.”
“Ah, yes, excuse me. I have two other séances to perform tonight, and the details get mixed up.”
“Two?” I repeat, astonished.
She gestures toward the ceiling. “The full moon is a very busy time for me. And forget about the solstices and the equinoxes! I’m booked a year in advance for those.”
When she sees my expression, she explains, “Experienced mediums are in high demand. You wouldn’t believe the amount of people who die and refuse to move on to the Other Side.”
I don’t know how to respond to that, but I feel as if it deserves a polite reply, even if it is nuts. “I’m glad to hear business is booming.”
Fiona returns and asks Claire, “Would you like to do a sweep of the house before we begin to see if you sense anything?”
Claire shakes her head. “That won’t be necessary. I’m getting very strong energy already.” She points toward the hallway. “What’s down there?”
“My office. And my husband’s.”
She and Fiona share a meaningful look.
“You guys can’t go all twinny telepathic on me. I’m freaked out enough already. What was that look for?”
Claire says, “I don’t want to alarm you, dear, but…” She hesitates, making a face as if she needs to run posthaste to the nearest toilet.
Sweet baby Jesus, if this gets any worse, I’ll climb up to the roof and throw myself off.
“Go on.”
“I think we should conduct the séance in your husband’s office.”
A distant boom of thunder rattles the windows. Of course it would happen right then because even the goddamn weather wants to see me go crazy.
“Why?”
She and Fiona share that weird look again. “Because I sense that’s where the spirit wants to have it.”
We stare at each other. Nobody says anything for a while. Then I say, “Claire, I’m going to ask you something now, and I want you to be completely honest with me.”
“Yes?”
“Is this bullshit?”
“Oh, no, my dear,” she says vehemently, shaking her head. “I assure you, this is the farthest thing from bullshit.”
As more evidence of my crumbling grip on reality, I spend a moment debating with myself about the difference between the words furthest and farthest. Then I sigh and give up.
“Fine. We’ll do the séance in Michael’s office. But if the Ghost of Christmas Past shows up, I can’t be held responsible if I crack and bludgeon it with the nearest heavy object. Let’s get this over with.”