“What does Aggie have to do with this?”
“That’s why I want to explain it to you.”
I consider hearing him out, consider listening to what he calls the truth, but in the end, what does it matter? Will it change that I feel used?
No. That feeling won’t go away.
Will it help me trust him again?
Not even in the slightest.
Will it mend this broken, heart-wrenching pain ripping through me with every breath I take?
No. Most likely, it will make it worse.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say, pushing past him again and reaching for the handle of the front door.
“What do you mean it doesn’t matter?” He presses his hand to the door, keeping me from opening it.
“Do you really think whatever you’re going to say is going to make a difference?”
“I sure as hell hope so.”
“It won’t,” I say, feeling defeated. “It won’t make a difference, because you already lost my trust.” I look him in the eyes. “You lied to me.”
“I didn’t lie to you,” he says in a desperate voice.
I fold my arms across my chest. “Really? So, you really wanted to stay married to get to know me? Not because you were scrounging to save your image?”
He takes a deep breath and I can tell he’s treading carefully with his words. “I did want to get to know you. I did from the moment I met you at the teachers’ barbeque, but given the way I didn’t hit it off with your brother, I didn’t believe getting to know you was an option. Why do you think I talked to you in Vegas? Because I was interested.” He tries to take my hand, but I refuse to let him hold it. “Coraline, please, let’s sit down and discuss this. Leaving isn’t going to help the situation.”
“The situation you created. I was fine moving on. I was fine with getting the annulment and living my single life, but you’re the one who pushed, you’re the one who lied—by omission—you’re the one who made me believe that I actually matter.”
“You do matter,” he shouts. “You fucking matter so much, Cora.”
“How can I believe one single word that comes out of your mouth, Pike? You speak so ill of your parents, and yet, you’re not that much better than them.”
He rears back, removing his hand from the door. Determination sets in his expression. “Do not throw them in my face. I’ve worked my arse off trying to get away from that life—”
“Worked your ass off? You used Iris to get a job here at Forest Heights. To me, it seems like you’ve barely done the work, Pike.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your dad told me. How you were engaged to Iris, how you used her to get your current job.”
Pike grips his head. “What? That’s not fucking true. I was never engaged to Iris, no matter how much she and my pa wanted it. Never once did I ask her to be my wife. And I didn’t use her connections to get this teaching job. Don’t you see, Cora? My pa came here to ruin my image, ruin us, because I took away the control he had over me. He had no other option than to try to fuck up our relationship, and that’s exactly what he did.”
“Maybe he wasn’t entirely truthful,” I say, placing my hand on the doorknob. “But you weren’t truthful either. And that’s what matters, Pike.”
“I’m sorry, Cora.”
I open the door.
“I wasn’t thinking.”
I cross the threshold of the townhome.
“I didn’t expect to fall in love with you.”
I pause.
Look over my shoulder.
“That right there proves that I was a pawn in your game, because your reasoning for staying married was to see if we could make it work, get to know each other. So, it doesn’t match up. If you’re trying to get to know me, and you like me, you stick around. You’re bound to fall in love. But this was all for your benefit and nothing else. I asked you why you wanted to stay married, what was behind it. You had multiple chances to come clean and you never did. This is on you, Pike. Your heartache . . . and mine. It rests on your shoulders.”
Without another word, I push away from the door and head to my car. In a daze, I send a text to the girls, telling them to meet me at my place, and then I pull out of the driveway and drive away from him . . . away from the future I thought I had. Again.
Silence fills the small confines of my apartment. My friends sit in their respective spots around the space, trying to take in my sobbing recollection of everything that happened.