“I don’t even know what loving someone else feels like, let alone how to accept it from someone.” I frown, hating how true the words are.
“Will you let me show you?”
His simple question steals my breath away. I nod my head, desperate to replace the ugliness Matteo left behind. There’s nothing I want more than Santiago’s love. I want to know what it feels like to be the center of someone’s world, even if it’s for a few hours.
Santiago rises from the couch and places me on my feet. He grabs my hand and drags me through the house toward his bedroom.
My pulse point throbs as he throws me on the bed. Heavy breaths leave my mouth, covering the clicking noises of Santiago removing his iWalk. A steady buzz takes over my body. My skin grows hot beneath my clothes, and I rip off all obstructions.
Santiago crawls over my body, chuckling. “You want to know what love feels like?” He cups the area begging for him. A single finger traces my arousal, spreading it.
“Yes.” I nod my head up and down. Do I ever. How can someone ever say no to him? He looks at me in a way I’ve never recognized before.
“Loving you feels like I found a life raft in the middle of a raging ocean.”
“Is that supposed to be romantic?” I tease.
He tugs on my hair, forcing me to arch my back. His lips trail down my neck before sucking on my nipple. Eager hands touch every inch of my skin as if he needs to commit my body to memory.
I groan as he inserts a finger and presses his thumb against my clit. His touch is electric. Thrilling. Adoring.
This is what love is. Being cherished and revered because the person wants to, not because they have to.
He leaves behind a faint kiss at my pulse point. “Loving you is like being stranded in a desert without food or water. Like I’m half delusional, wondering if this whole damn thing is a mirage, because nothing should feel or look this good.” His slow torture takes a turn as he increases his tempo and inserts another finger inside of me.
His expert touch ignites every cell inside of me. Heat rushes across my skin as he strokes my most sensitive spot, forcing my back to arch off the mattress. All too soon, he leaves me panting as he makes quick work of the condom.
He returns, lining himself at my entrance. “And most of all, loving you is realizing heaven isn’t a place, but a person.”
I clutch onto his back as he slides into me. Waves of heat roll across my skin as I take every inch of him. The feeling is unlike anything I’ve experienced before, with a surge of emotions hitting me all at once. Santiago’s words seep into the crushed part of me, reviving something I forgot existed in the first place. The part my mother broke. The part I hid from the world after years of anger and disappointment.
Tears leak out of my eyes, soaking the pillow underneath me. The way Santiago looks at me sets me ablaze from the inside out. I feel like a phoenix begging to rise again.
His thumb wipes away one of my tears. “I love you, Chloe. And it’s okay if you don’t know what it means to be loved by someone, let alone love someone else because I promise to love you enough for the two of us. To love you every day to make up for everyone else who failed miserably.”
He really does love me. Deeply. Madly. Unconditionally.
I tighten my legs around his waist, pulling him as close as possible to my body. “I want that kind of love.”
His lips clash against mine like lightning clapping through the stormy sky. It feeds the hunger building inside of me. His love surrounds us, healing me in the process.
He pulls me back into the moment, kissing me into a mindlessness. Together, we find our release.
This is bliss.
This is love.
This is us.
39
Santiago
Sleep evades me as I consider everything Chloe shared about Matteo. Something about the situation doesn’t sit right with me, and I can’t shake it. I need him to understand why this is so important to Chloe. She deserves a chance to explain herself, and he needs to listen.
It takes an insane amount of willpower to crawl out of bed and leave Chloe behind. She looks peaceful, mindlessly grabbing a pillow in my absence. I’m tempted to stare at her for a few minutes but decide against it. I’ll never leave if I keep it up.
After putting on my prosthetic and some clothes, I make my way toward Matteo’s house. I press the ringer on his gate.
“Chi e?”
“Santiago Alatorre.” I keep my voice neutral.
Nothing happens. Minutes pass, and not a single sound comes from the speaker. I move to press the button again but stop myself when the gates creak open.