Itching to go to him where he stands feet away, rattling with emotion and residual hurt, unchecked tears gliding down his face, I drop my hands to my sides.
“We broke a lot of promises being young, reckless, and na?ve—but I think I figured out where we went wrong—at least, where I went wrong.” Taking a steadying breath, I keep swinging. “Love is patient, Easton—it has to be, and we both needed it. Love is kind. We had that in abundance and lost it along the way. We both needed to remember that, we…I,” I run the sleeve of his jacket over my face. “Those promises we made, they mattered, but it was the vows that would have kept us together—the vows I wish I would have paid more attention to. You were always protective, but I wasn’t the only one that needed protecting, and I didn’t do my part, and for that, I’ll forever be sorry.”
Mustering the strength I have left, I continue to swing.
“I left you alone in it—I didn’t mean to, but I did. I let their past and my guilt tear us apart. I allowed my relationship with my father to overrule the most important love of my life—you. I took your patience and love for granted, Easton, because I believed in you—in everything you said, in the way you viewed and felt about us, because I felt and believed it too. But I didn’t nurture us the way I should have, when you needed me most, because I was too terrified to lose my future. But I lost it anyway when I lost you…and I miss you so much. I miss us. I regret more than anything, not apologizing for my mistakes when I had the chance.” I step closer to him, and he remains where he stands. “Married or not, I want the chance back to uphold those vows. I want the chance to be the partner you deserve. I w-want you t-to take me back.” An involuntary hiccup interrupts me as I shudder with it. Easton’s chest rises and falls. “I-if y-you can find it in your heart to forgive me for that mistake. If you c-can give me a chance—”
“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” He admonishes as I lower my guilty gaze. “Look at me, Beauty,” the hint of command in his words kicks my heart into overdrive. He finally steps forward, trapping my face in his hands, eyes searching. “What took you so fucking long?”
“I’m sorry,” I lick the salt from my lips. “I got lost.”
“But I told you where to find me. I told you I’d be right here where you left me,” he reminds me as I shake in his hold, hope lighting up my being. “It’s not too late, Beauty,” he murmurs, “and with you, it was never going to be.”
He jerks me to him, diminishing all space between us as I wrap myself around him, relieved cries leaving me as I soak in his scent. Pressing kisses from his throat to his lips, they urgently meet and mold as we get lost in our kiss. My breaths continue to hitch as he sweeps his urgent tongue along mine, a pained groan leaving him as we cry our relief into each other’s mouths. We drag it out for several blissful minutes, our connection a balm to our stinging souls. Easton gently pulls away, eyes full of concern as he furiously begins to wipe my tears with gentle thumbs.
“Please don’t cry anymore, baby. I’m sorry for being such a bastard,” he whispers, “I let the bitter asshole take over, but I’m giving his self-righteous ass the boot because I hate seeing you like this.”
Running gentle knuckles along my face, I lean into his touch. “So…I was right…you didn’t want a divorce that day.”
He shakes his head. “God, no.”
“But you signed,” I sniffle.
“You didn’t stop me,” he croaks as he continually soothes me with gentle thumbs. “How I was hoping you would stop me, Natalie. I couldn’t take it when you asked for friendship, and I felt like I’d lost you for good then. I was fucking breaking apart because I knew I had to set you free and that you may never come back.”
“Why?”
“I was so fucking selfish in my pain. I didn’t care who else it was hurting. I knew if we had a chance, I had to let you come to me. Reading my mother’s book changed a lot of my perception. The answer rang clear for me from what I derived from our parents’ story. After we fell apart, I took a page from my father’s book and decided to give you the time to choose your path, whether it included me or not—like he did for my mom. I practically forced you into a relationship the first time.”
“That’s not true. I wanted it too.”
“I know that…but I went about it the wrong way. I didn’t heed your constant warnings because I wanted us to happen too much. Even when you begged me, I didn’t listen. I’m at fault, too, Natalie. This isn’t solely on you.”