When I went into our house, Linus’ USB waited for me on the table. Bern or Runa must’ve brought it by.
Linus was still unconscious. It should’ve depressed and worried me, but I was too numb.
I had taken a shower, which made me feel a bit better, put on a long T-shirt and a fresh pair of underwear, and climbed onto the bed with my laptop. And then I stared at it for about five minutes.
I wasn’t sure why I hesitated. I wasn’t afraid. I was . . . weary and wary. Both.
Nothing good ever came from ignorance. I slid the USB into the slot, accessed it, and fast-forwarded the video to the point I remembered.
“Very shortly you’ll be facing a crisis, if you aren’t already. You’ve concentrated on only one aspect of your powers, but your magic is more complex than you realize. The black wings are the first manifestation of the problem, and it will become worse in times of emotional distress.”
Linus leaned back. I recognized that pose. He was in his teaching mode.
“An ice mage attacks while hiding in a crowd. How do you find him?”
“He will be the one with the fever.”
Magic altered the natural laws, but it didn’t destroy them. An ice mage drastically lowered the temperature of the targeted body of water, and while magic dealt with most of the displaced heat, some of it slipped through. The air around the ice mage would become noticeably warmer. If they kept it up long enough, they would start to sweat, and their face would flush.
“We define ice mages as those who freeze, but we could also define them as those who inefficiently generate heat through displacement.”
Where was he going with this?
“The siren beguiles and seduces. Our magic is named for her, but she also has a counterpart.”
Alessandro slipped into the room and stopped. I paused the video and patted the blanket next to me. I didn’t want to hide anything from him.
He approached, pulled off his boots, and sprawled on the blankets next to me. I scooted closer to him. He put his head on my bare thigh. I restarted Linus’ magnum opus.
“。 . . she also has a counterpart. The harpy.”
What?
“The harpy flies on black wings. When she emerges, she doesn’t coax. She destroys.”
“The harpy?” Alessandro murmured.
“Your magic is survival based,” Linus said. “From the moment you were born, it began assessing the environment and attempting to eliminate those it perceived as a threat. From speaking to your mother, I know that you’ve encountered some people who have been unaffected, like your pediatrician. People like that truly had your best interest in their heart. However, they are very few and far between.”
“Who else besides the pediatrician?” Alessandro said. “And me, of course.”
“Cornelius and Runa are both immune,” I told him. “It’s strange, because the immunity developed gradually.”
“Most people are fundamentally selfish. While they may not actively wish you harm, when given a choice between your survival and self-interest, they will choose self-interest. That’s enough for your passive magic field to designate them as a threat. Your pediatrician, on the other hand, would literally die to keep you safe.”
On screen, Linus took another sip of his drink.
“Through no fault of your own, you grew up terrified of your power, and you’ve exerted an enormous effort to keep it contained. Your control is outstanding. But to achieve that control, you’ve suppressed a lot of your emotional needs to limit other people’s exposure to your magic. You didn’t date. You didn’t have friends. You denied yourself the web of human relationships that keeps us anchored among others of our kind. Humans are social animals, Catalina. We may choose to be solitary, but it comes at a cost.
“The last couple of years have brought a lot of firsts to you. First best friend. First opportunity to solely shoulder a heavy responsibility. First love. First heartbreak.”
I ran my hands through Alessandro’s hair.
“First deliberate decision to kill,” Linus said. “Not because someone else said you should, but as a consequence of your own assessment. It’s a coming of emotional age of sorts, much delayed. On a deeper level you welcome it and that’s exactly what the harpy guards.
“It’s easy to dismiss her as rage or fear. You can conquer both, yet you can’t suppress the harpy. The harpy is love.”
I paused the recording.
Love? The screeching enraged creature with black wings was love?
“I told you,” Alessandro said softly. “You are still you.”