“How? What happened in that tower?”
Hanne took a breath. “Prince Rasmus started drinking when Fjerda’s bells were destroyed. He was all mocking words for my father and his plans. He … he thought it was amusing to give me a slap.”
“We knew how cruel he could be. I never should have left you alone with him.”
“It was a small slap.”
“Hanne!”
“It was. It was a test. I think he wanted to see how far he could go. He told me to strike him back, just as he did with Joran. He dared me to hit him. He hit me again. He said we’d play this game whenever he pleased when we were husband and wife. Joran tried to stop him, but … I panicked. I didn’t mean to do it.”
“You used your power on him.”
A tear slid down Hanne’s cheek. “His heart. I think I crushed it … I’ve never hurt someone that way.”
Nina cupped Hanne’s face in her palms. “I know you didn’t mean to. I know you never would.” Hanne had always been too good and too kind for the ugliness of this world.
“I told Joran to run for help. I tried to heal the prince. But I knew he was dead.”
“So you tailored him.”
“Yes. And myself. As quickly as I could. But Joran … I think he took his time.”
To help Hanne? Or because he wanted Prince Rasmus dead? Whatever you require, Your Highness. Could Nina call that redemption? Did his motives matter? Joran had saved Hanne’s life today. He had spoken against Brum. He’d known Nina was not Mila Jandersdat and yet he’d kept that secret to himself. Maybe it could be a beginning.
“I bound my breasts, changed our clothes, and … and … I threw his body out the window.”
“All Saints.”
Hanne sat down on a wide velvet bench. “What am I to tell my mother? She thinks I’m dead. You can’t imagine what it was to hear her grieve, to see you on your knees weeping for me. I can’t lose her, Nina.”
“We’ll find a way to tell her. In time. But Hanne … what do we do now? You’ll have to face the Grimjer king and queen.”
“I can tailor myself more fully before then. Though I wish I had your gift for performance.”
Nina had to laugh. “You did brilliantly. I absolutely believed you were Rasmus. You’re lucky I didn’t murder you on the spot.”
“Don’t think I wasn’t worried. But fooling his parents?”
Hanne had learned deception from Nina over the last months. She’d spent a good part of her life at the Ice Court learning its protocols, and she’d been so much in the prince’s company that his mannerisms and ways of speech were no mystery.
“We’ll practice. We have time on the journey.”
Hanne didn’t look convinced. “If the king and queen ask me questions about Rasmus’ childhood…”
“I can help with that,” said Nina. After all, they had the counsel of the dead.
“Will you?” Hanne’s brow creased. “Can you love a murderer?”
“I might ask the same.”
Hanne hesitated. “And can you love me in this body?”
“It is your heart I love. You know that, don’t you?”
Tears formed in Hanne’s eyes. “I hoped.”
“But where does this end? How long can you stay trapped this way?”
“I’m not trapped, Nina.” Hanne blew out a breath. “What if I told you there’s a rightness in this body? That ever since I understood what tailoring could do, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about what might be?”
Nina remembered the guilty look on Hanne’s face when she’d admitted she’d been tailoring herself in secret. She thought of the way Hanne’s eyes had slid away from her own reflection. Nina hadn’t understood. “You said you didn’t know if you could be happy.”
“I still don’t. I don’t know what it is to live in a body that feels like it could be mine. All I know is … I lost my father today, maybe my mother. But not myself. And if I have to play the role of prince for this possibility, then it’s a trade I’ll gladly make.”
“This from the person who said she hated parties.”
“It isn’t the face I would have chosen. I don’t want to be Rasmus.”
Nina put her hands on Hanne’s shoulders. “You aren’t Rasmus. You’re someone new, someone I can’t wait to know.”
Hanne’s smile was small, a precious, fragile thing. “We wanted to change the world. Maybe this is our chance.”