I think for a while, then admit, “I don’t really know what to say here, Diego. This is just about the strangest and stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”
If I insulted him, he doesn’t show it. He simply sighs.
“Honestly, man, you did me a favor. So I’m gonna do you a favor and keep my mouth shut. I know if everybody found out it was you who faked my death and started all this shit in the first place, you’d have mad problems on your hands. Am I right?”
“You’re not wrong.”
“Exactly. Mad problems. You’re welcome.”
“I could kill you right now if I wanted to ensure your silence.”
“Yeah, you could.”
He doesn’t sound like he cares one way or the other.
Strangely enough, I believe this idiot. He really does just want out.
“Tell you what. I’ll think about it.”
Through the bandages comes a dry chuckle. “You do that. If I don’t wake up, I’ll see you in hell, pendejo.”
“It’ll take a while for me to get there.”
“I’ll wait.”
He closes his eyes. When it becomes obvious he’s either fallen asleep or is too exhausted to continue, I rise from the chair.
Before I can climb back up into the HVAC duct, Diego stops me cold by saying, “One more thing. Your comrade, Stavros. You can’t trust him.”
I turn and look down at him. His eyes are still closed.
“Why not?”
“Let’s just say he’s not as loyal to you as he should be.”
The hair on the back of my neck prickles. When I don’t say anything, Diego opens his eyes and looks at me.
“Snitches are bitches who end up in ditches.”
“What the fuck does that gibberish mean?”
“It means put the screws to that little bitch and find out.”
I snort. “You’ll have to do better than that.”
He pauses, then says, “This place has turned into a confessional booth. People think you’ve got amnesia, all kinds of strange shit comes out of their mouths. Everybody wants to tell you a story. Just like you, when you dropped in.”
I get it instantly, and my blood starts to boil. “Stavros made a deal with Declan.”
“Just so you know, it wasn’t Declan’s idea. Your boy offered. Threw you right under the bus without batting an eyelash. Cold as a snake.”
“What was the deal?”
“Don’t worry, it didn’t pan out. I’ll let Stavros tell you the details, but the point is, don’t leave that puto alone with your silverware. He’ll be tinkling like a wind chime on his way out the door.”
“Why would you tell me this? Even if it’s true, what’s in it for you?”
“Eh, you treated me pretty good when I was in that cage. Gave me a little vacation. A little time to think about my future. Plus, bottom line, you saved my life. Like you said, it woulda been smarter for you to let me burn, but you didn’t.”
I narrow my eyes at him. It dawns on me that this kid is brighter than he seems.
“You knew I’d come, didn’t you? When you started that fire, you knew I’d show up to try to get you out.”
His smile is faint. His eyes drift close.
“Don’t take this personally, but whoever your friend Malek is that you mentioned, he was right when he said women make a man soft. I’ve seen it too many times now, with homies even harder than you. A man starts getting really good pussy, like life-changing pussy, he can’t remember what he used to be so mad about all the time. Sound familiar?”
I don’t answer.
Diego doesn’t speak again.
I really hate it when other people are right.
35
Mal
It’s pissing rain when I get back to the cabin a few hours before dawn.
I stand outside the front door in the dark with my hands braced on either side of the frame and my head hanging down, taking a moment to try to cool off.
Every mile closer I drove, the harder it was not to jam my foot onto the accelerator.
She’s the most powerful magnet, pulling me home.
From the moment I left, I’ve thought of nothing else. Through car rides and plane flights and meetings, while driving an icepick through a man’s skull. Her face was in front of my eyes the whole time. Hovering there. Haunting me.
That’s what I feel like. Haunted.
She’s a ghost who’s moved inside my head and won’t leave.
A sweet, mouthy, maddening little ghost. Who challenges me at every turn and sees the best in me, even when I’m shouting at her that she shouldn’t.