“No, Viv. Please don’t say that. We can get through this. I will do whatever you want to make this right. Anything. I’ll do anything, but I can’t lose you. Please, Viv, I’m begging you.” He drops to his knees, clutching my legs and clinging to me.
God, how did we end up here? Both of us destroyed and hurting.
I shake my head, as a wave of sadness washes over me. “You’ve already lost me, Reeve. I might as well be single, because I never see you. I'm lonely, and I’m heartsick, and I can’t do it anymore.”
“Vivien. I love you. I know I’ve fucked up, but please give me another chance.” Easing back, he lifts one knee and removes a box from his pocket. He pops the lid, and I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. “I was planning to ask you to marry me tonight. It’s always been you, Viv. Deep down, you know that. Don’t let her come between us anymore than she already has. I’m begging you. Please forgive me, and say you’ll be my wife.”
This is crazy. Even if things hadn’t blown up today, how could he feel we were in a place where it was right to propose? Our relationship has never been so broken. Hurt infiltrates every nook and cranny of my body, and I wonder if your heart can physically break? Because it feels like mine is. I stare at him through blurry eyes, forcing words out over the anguished lump in my throat. “There was a time I would have jumped into your arms and screamed yes, but we are so far removed from that now.” Sorrow fills my chest as I glance at the stunning princess-cut diamond engagement ring that would be perfect if I wasn’t so devastated by his betrayal. “How could you even consider asking me to marry you when our relationship is in tatters?”
“We’ve lost our way, but we’ll get it back. I’m still committed to you, and this was my way of proving it. I wasn’t expecting us to get married any time soon, but I hoped you would see how much I love you and know I’m still serious about spending the rest of our lives together.”
Just kill me now.
“This is the action of a desperate man. It’s nothing more,” I whisper, drowning in pain and sorrow. “I don’t even understand why you claim to want me anymore.”
“Because I fucking love you!” he yells. “I made a mistake. Lots of them, but my love for you has never wavered. Not once. You’re the other half of my heart and soul, Vivien. Please say you believe that? Please, baby. Please, please, believe me. I can’t lose you. I’ll die without you.”
I clutch the wall behind me, incredulous that he’s stooping to emotional blackmail. My heart is in shreds, and I can’t tolerate much more. Can’t he see that? “I don’t believe it, Reeve,” I croak, sniffling. “I don’t believe a word that comes out of your mouth anymore. I can’t marry you. I won’t marry you, so put that ring away.”
I can’t bear to look at it. It’s the physical representation of all my shattered hopes and dreams. Although the ring is truly stunning, it’s ugly to me because it embodies everything I’ve lost. My heart is obliterated, and I’m amazed it’s still able to beat in my chest.
My anger is fading, replaced with utter devastation and a hopeless sense of inevitability. “Actions speak louder than words, Reeve. And your actions confirm I don’t matter.”
“I’ll put out another statement. I’ll tell the world it was a mistake. I’ll stop taking drugs. I’ll pull out of the movie.” Hysteria filters through his voice as realization dawns. He’s grasping at straws now, throwing everything at it, because he knows he can’t talk his way out of this. Staggering to his feet, he repockets the ring with the saddest look on his face. Seeing it hurts me, but he doesn’t deserve any sympathy, and it’s not my place to console him anymore. My place in his life is dead and buried, and I can’t allow myself to get sucked in any longer.
This must end now.
Even though it’ll kill me to say these words, I know this is the way it has to be. “You have pushed me away, downplayed my feelings, scoffed at my concerns, and let yourself be manipulated. We should have broken up like Audrey and Alex and protected our past because everything is tarnished now. All my memories include you, Reeve. Every single memory I have of my childhood, you are in it, and now they are all tainted!” I cry as heartfelt pain surges through my veins. “She hasn’t just stolen you from me. She’s stolen every good memory. I will never be able to look at our past with anything but pain in my heart.”