“I liked that I could just be a man with you,” he says. “That I didn’t have to live up to some expectation and that you weren’t nervous with me. I liked that you were real. I never get real, ever.” He stares at me for several tense seconds. “But I’m sorry I lied to you.”
I don’t know where we can possibly go from here. “Did you really bring me here to talk about what happened between us? You don’t have anything to tell me about Jupiter?”
He takes a few seconds to answer this, and in the quiet, I watch his jaw clench and relax. “No,” he says finally. “I had information to tell you.”
Immediately, my brain changes tracks. “Wait. You do know something?”
This story is a powder keg. My UK colleague Ian and I spent the last two weeks scrambling to unearth what’s really happening inside Jupiter. We found some bombshells, but without sources willing to speak to us, we also met a frustrating number of dead ends.
And Alec knows something important enough for him to call Billy and have me sent here? Stunned, I feel my jaw open and then close.
He reads my reaction in the silence. “I wasn’t sure I could talk about it at the hotel.” Alec doesn’t break eye contact but winces very slightly. “Unfortunately, my source is having second thoughts.”
An incredulous laugh bursts free. “You are so full of shit.”
“I’m not. There’s so much I want to tell you, but the story isn’t mine to share. I really can’t talk about it without this person’s go-ahead.”
The words slice out from between my gritted teeth: “If you end up somehow being involved in this disgusting—”
“Gigi!” Alec cuts in. Horror washes him out. “Are—are you kidding? That’s not—” He closes his eyes, taking a steadying breath. “I’m not involved with Jupiter in any way—not as an investor or patron. That’s not at all what I wanted to share with you.”
Either he’s an even better actor than I imagined or this one landed on an incredibly tender target. “Good,” I say, more gently now. “That is a huge relief.”
He opens his eyes and looks at me steadily. “I thought I had information to give you that could help you expose someone, but I don’t.”
The adrenaline drains in a cold flush, leaving me numb. “Okay, then we’re done here.”
I make my way to the door, but Alec cuts out a sharp, “Wait.” I pause but don’t turn to face him. “I… also realize we forgot to exchange numbers.”
Now I turn to gape. “You’re unbelievable.”
“Come on. I’m trying to make things right.”
Unexpectedly, my heart tightens in a painful pinch. “Why?”
“Because I’ve thought of nothing but you for the past thirty-six hours.”
His words drop a black curtain in front of every other thought. I forget about the story and—for a scattered few seconds—I forget to be mad. All I see is his posture, with hands tucked tightly into his pockets and the heavy bob of his Adam’s apple as he swallows again. I see his tongue as he licks his lips, anxious for my reply.
My “Why?” comes out much quieter this time.
“It…” He seems unsure how to answer this. “I needed to see you again.”
Apparently I only know one word anymore. “Why?”
His disbelieving smile is fleeting. “Gigi, come on.”
“For sex,” I guess flatly.
“For whatever this is between us,” he corrects. “I have a hard time believing it was just me. Did it feel like regular sex the other night? The kind of sex you’ve had with other people?”
“Not sure that’s a fair comparison,” I say. “I’m betting my list is much shorter than yours.”
He sends a hand into his hair, looking away. I should feel guilty for that shitty jab, but I’m too distracted by the tight clench of his jaw, the way his neck flushes red in anger. This deep, ravenous feeling in the pit of my stomach shoves everything else aside.
“Right.” Alec turns back to me. “Then you’d know if I just wanted sex, I could get it anywhere.”
Exactly, echoes a chiding voice in my head. The assistant who sends underwear to Seattle could easily find someone to satisfy an itch. It isn’t about that, and you know it, Gigi. You’re being a coward.
I let out a shaking breath. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”