“The first time or the last time?” Mel asked. “You might not want to ask that—we have sleeping issues at our house. And now Jack lets him in the bed with us. Take my advice, don’t start that!”
Vanessa peered at Mel’s growing tummy. David had just turned a year and their second baby was due in May. “I hope you have a really big bed,” she said.
“There will be plenty of room when I kick Jack out of it. Come on—let’s look at Mattie first and take care of his shots.” Mel carried the baby back to the exam room with Vanessa following behind.
Mel had delivered little Matt right in Vanessa’s bedroom and their bond had grown deep and strong. It didn’t take long to determine the baby was at a good weight and in excellent health. “I’ll take him out to Walt while you get into a gown, how’s that?”
“Thanks,” Vanni said.
A few minutes later Mel was back. “Your dad took the baby over to Jack’s for a cup of coffee. And some male bonding, I suppose.”
Vanni had taken her place on the exam table, and Mel checked her heart, blood pressure, and got her in position for a pelvic. “Everything looks great. You had a wonderful delivery, Vanni—you’re in excellent shape. And boy, did you lose weight quickly. Isn’t breast-feeding a miracle?”
“I’m not back in my old jeans yet.”
“I bet you’re close. Go ahead, sit up,” Mel said, offering a hand. “Anything we should talk about?”
“Lots of things. Can I ask you something personal?”
“You can always ask,” Mel said while writing in the chart.
“I know that before you married Jack, you were widowed…”
Mel stopped writing. She closed the chart and looked at Vanni with a sympathetic smile. “I’ve been expecting this conversation,” she said.
“How long was it?” Vanni asked, and Mel knew exactly what she was referring to.
“I met Jack nine months after my husband’s death. I married him six months later. And if you confer with the town historian and gossips, you’ll learn that I was at least three months pregnant at the time. Closer to four.”
“We have a town historian?”
“About six hundred of them,” Mel said with a laugh. “If you have anything you’d like to keep secret, you should consider moving to another town.”
“Matt’s only been dead a few months, but he’s been gone almost a year… Mel, he wasn’t on a business trip. He was in combat, out of touch. I talked to him a total of three times, saw his face once on live video cam. The letters were short and sparse. It’s been a really long time since—”
Mel touched Vanni’s knee. “There’s no rule of thumb on this, Vanessa. Everything I’ve read, and I’ve read a lot about widowhood, says that when people enter new relationships relatively soon after losing a spouse, it indicates they had happiness in their marriage. Being married was a good experience for them.” She smiled.
“I didn’t even know for sure I was pregnant when Matt left for Iraq last May. I’m not thinking about another marriage, of course,” Vanni said. “But I am thinking about—Well, what I’m thinking is that I don’t want to be alone forever.”
“Of course you shouldn’t be alone forever. You have a lot of life to live.”
Vanni smiled. “Should I be thinking about birth control?”
“We can talk about that. You wouldn’t want to be as unprepared as your midwife. Especially with having a baby to take care of. Believe me.” She took a breath and ran a hand over her big belly. “I wouldn’t let myself think ahead! I remember when my sister said, ‘I know widows who have remarried, and are happy.’ I almost took her head off. I was appalled. I wasn’t at all hopeful life could go on.”
“It sure went on for you,” Vanni said.
“Boy howdy. I came here absolutely determined to live out my days lonely and miserable, but that damn Jack—he ambushed me. I think I fell in love with him the minute I met him, but I fought it. As though I might somehow be unfaithful to my husband’s memory by moving on, which was absurd. I had the kind of husband who would have wanted me to have love in my life, and I bet you did, too.”
“You don’t send a man off to war without talking a few things through—my parents taught me that. One of the first ways Tom and I figured out the general was headed for a possible deployment was when the paperwork came out. Wills, trusts, etcetera. Not just in case something happened to him, but what if he was away in some jungle or desert war zone and something happened to Mom?” She smiled a bit wistfully. “Matt didn’t dwell on the worst-case scenario, but he was quick and to the point. He said I wasn’t the type to wallow and he’d be disappointed in me if I did. He had a few requests—where he wanted to be buried, what to do with his favorite personal items, to make sure his parents got regular visits especially if we had children. And—if a good man showed his face, I was not to hesitate.” She took a breath. “My requests of him were almost identical.” She straightened. “If I’m lucky enough to run into another man half as wonderful as Matt, I should be ready.”