Nothing in my teeth.
I turn back around just in time to catch her walking toward me, and she looks fucking stunning. Dressed in a flowy black dress that reaches just below her knees, her hair’s curled in waves . . . my pulse is racing.
“Hey, long day?” she asks while adjusting one of her earrings.
“Yeah, pretty long. What about you?”
“It was okay. Had to have another meeting with Regis. He was slightly more pleasant than usual, but I think that’s because he knows we leave tomorrow.” She switches to the other ear, playing with that earring now. “What do you have planned for tonight?”
Glad she asked.
“Well, I was thinking—”
Knock. Knock.
I glance behind me. “Did you order room service?”
“No, that’s Derek,” she says. “We have a date tonight.”
And just like that, every ounce of excitement, emotion, and confidence drains from my veins and pools at the bottom of my feet.
As if my heart has been ripped from my chest, being scratched, and scarred by my ribs in the process. All my hopes. All my thoughts. All my fucking courage, it’s all wiped away. Evaporated. Demolished.
She’s . . . she’s going on a date?
This can’t be fucking happening.
This has to be a joke, right?
She can’t possibly be going on a date with him, not after . . . well, not after everything.
But to my horror, Kelsey reaches past me and opens the door, revealing Derek on the other side.
Fuck . . .
“Hey, Derek, just need to grab my shoes. Give me a second.”
“Not a problem.” Derek turns toward me as Kelsey opens the entryway closet. “Hey, you must be JP. Nice to meet you. Your brother has talked a lot about you.”
He holds out his hand, and because I don’t want to look like a dick, I take it in mine and give it a shake. “Nice to meet you,” I say, but I barely recognize my voice. It’s gravelly, dark.
Fuck, I’m so upset.
So goddamn upset that I can feel my throat start to tighten.
“Okay, I’m ready,” Kelsey says.
She’s slipping away.
My plans.
My night.
My big ask.
It’s all crumbling right in front of me.
I can’t feel my feet. My lungs don’t seem to have any air in them. And it feels as if a sharp knife is bludgeoning my chest continuously, ratcheting up this overwhelming sense of pain.
“I’ll be home later,” Kelsey says, her hand dragging over my arm.
Her touch . . . it does something inside of me.
It reminds me of what Breaker said.
You need to use words and tell her how you feel. So far, you’ve tried to show her what you feel. Now it’s time to speak, man. Give her your truths.
He’s not wrong. My tactics have proven to be shortsighted.
And before she can take another step, I ask, “Can I talk to you for a second?”
She pauses, looks over her shoulder, and asks, “Right now?”
“Yes,” I answer.
I must look distraught because she tells Derek to give her a second and then follows me down the hallway to my room, where I shut the door. I shed my suit jacket, toss it on a chair in the corner, and pace the room.
“Is everything okay?”
“No.” I shake my head. “Everything is not okay.” I pause and look up at her. “I’m going to say something that I know you certainly weren’t expecting but, fuck, I need you to know.”
“JP, what’s going on?”
“I like you, Kelsey,” I say, just letting it all fly out. “I fucking like you, and I . . . I want to ask you out on a date, a real date.”
Her mouth falls slightly open.
“And I know this isn’t the best timing and that this is selfish of me because you’re about to go out on a date, but please, please don’t go out with him. Stay here, with me, be with me, give me a chance.” She doesn’t say anything. And I wait as she stands there in shock. “I had plans for tonight. I was going to take you to Parkside and tell you how much I like you and want to be with you. I know that’s hard to believe, given your first impression of me, but I swear, Kelsey, I swear I’m fucking ready for something more.”
“JP . . . I . . . I don’t know what to say.”
“You don’t have to say anything, just don’t go out with him. I don’t think I could fucking take it. Your last date was when I drank myself stupid. That’s how long I’ve felt this for you. I don’t think I could survive tonight knowing he’s claiming you as his, holding your hand, making you laugh . . . kissing you. All I’ve wanted is to fucking kiss you, to taste your lips, to make you mine. I’ve wanted this ever since I met you, from the first moment I laid eyes on you, Kelsey. I knew you were special. I knew you were someone I had to get to know, that I wanted to be around. And, sure, I didn’t go about it the right way in the beginning, but I’ve been trying. I’ve tried to tell you so many times. So many fucking times.” I push my hand through my hair. “Please, Kelsey, please just stay here with me, talk this out, give me a chance.”