“I’m not sure what to believe.”
“We kept that telescope, never fenced it, not even when we were hungry.”
“That’s a nice story, except for the part about breaking and entering and stealing.”
“What were we supposed to do, Marvin? Starve to death?”
“That don’t make it right.”
“Whatever.” Cody points to the moon. “Brian liked the dark nights, the Milky Way, thousands of stars, but me, I loved the moon. And when it was full, like tonight, it was almost impossible to see the constellations. Didn’t bother me. I spent hours exploring its surface, convinced there was somebody living up there. You see that dark area just to the right of dead center? That’s the Sea of Tranquility, where Apollo 11 landed in July of 1969. Remember that, Marvin?”
“Everybody remembers that. You were just a kid.”
“I was eight years old, living with a foster family, the Conways. One of many, back then. They were okay, I guess, but one of the bad things about being a foster kid is that you always know that you really don’t belong. Anyway, it was a Sunday night and Mr. Conway made us all gather in front of the TV and watch the moon landing. It didn’t mean much to me. You?”
“I don’t know, Cody. It was a long time ago. Back then little black boys didn’t dream of growing up to be astronauts.”
“Well, I was a little white boy and I damned sure didn’t dream of being one either. All I remember dreaming about was having a mother and a father and living in a nice little house.”
Cody backs away and leans on the picnic table next to Marvin. They watch the searchlights sweep the sky in the distance.
“What were your dreams, Marvin?”
“I don’t know. Playing baseball. I had good parents, still do, with lots of brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, one big family, happy most of the time. In that respect, I’m a lucky man.”
“You sure are.”
“Willie Mays was my hero and I dreamed of playing in the big leagues. My dad was a player, did three years in the minors, but that was before Jackie Robinson. He couldn’t make any money so he quit and came home. He taught me the game and I loved it.”
“How far did you go?”
Marvin finds this amusing. “Not far. In 1965 the White Sox drafted me in the forty-fifth round, which happened to be the last round, and they offered me two hundred dollars to sign.”
“Did you?”
“No. My dad said don’t do it. He knew I couldn’t make it in the bigs, too slow, and he didn’t want me to waste the next five years bouncing around the minors. He wanted me to go to college, but we couldn’t quite swing it.”
“He must have been a smart man.”
“Still is. I listen to him, off and on, and he still likes to give advice.”
“And your mom?”
“Oh, she’s still around. They’ve been married for fifty-something years. She likes to give advice too.”
Cody is too nervous to stay in one place. He walks to the fence and stares at the moon. “One time, I guess I was about twelve, me and Brian were in the woods and we were hungry, cold, it was wintertime, and we were scoping out houses to break into. It was night, just after dark, and we sneaked up behind this house at the edge of the woods, a new subdivision. We shinnied up a tree for a better look. We were like cats in the night, moved so quick. We looked down into the house. There was a big window near the kitchen, and there was this perfect little family all gathered around the table having dinner. Father, mother, three kids, one boy about my age. Eating, talking, laughing, behind them was a fire in the fireplace. I thought—What happened to me? Why am I up here in a tree, hungry and cold, and that kid has the perfect life? What went wrong, Marvin?”
“I don’t have an answer.”
“I know you don’t, Marvin, so just humor me, okay? My biological clock is ticking. I mean, really ticking.”
“We better get back inside. You got thirty-three minutes. The warden might catch us out here.”
“What’s he gonna do? Give me some demerits? Put me on probation?”
“Don’t know, but he can stick me over there in the general population with the riffraff.”
Cody laughs at this. “I guess life’s better here on death row.”
“I prefer it.”
“Thank you, Marvin, for this.” He waves at the moon. “Thank you for being nice to me. Some of those other guards are assholes.”