I grab the knocker and slam it against the door a bit harder than usual. We stand side by side, two stiff bodies unaccustomed to each other’s proximity. I swipe my damp palms down the sides of my dress. My nerves seem out of place compared to Declan’s cool indifference.
Nana swings the door open. She scans Declan from head to toe before turning her gaze toward me. “I now understand why you’re willing to work weekends and holidays for this man. If my boss had looked half as good as him, I would have never quit.”
I want to find the nearest sinkhole and jump inside of it. Declan’s usually empty gaze is missing, replaced by bright eyes so unlike him, I blink to make sure I’m not seeing things.
He finds this…funny?
Only because he feeds off people’s embarrassment.
“I’m Declan. Nice to meet you.” He holds out his palm.
“Nice to meet you too.” Nana speaks to the expensive bottle of wine.
Declan offers it to her, and she disappears into the kitchen.
I look away. My chest shakes from withheld laughter.
“I see where you get your sparkling personality from.” The warmth from Declan’s body presses into me as he wraps an arm around my waist.
Whatever humor quickly evaporates, replaced by the uneven beat of my heart.
Guess we are just faking it until we make it here.
Together, we walk inside the apartment. His hand moves from my hip to the small of my back. The way my body burns from his touch makes the gesture seem inappropriate. Not once over the years has Declan made a move to touch me. If anything, it’s almost as if he avoided every possible situation that would lead to us getting close enough to have skin-to-skin contact.
Maybe that’s why I feel thrown off from a simple graze of his palm.
…Or maybe I’m suffering from side effects associated with the longest dry spell in Chicago. Only time will tell.
Mom pops her head out of the kitchen. “I’ll be out in a few minutes!
Make yourself at home, Declan.” Mom’s cooking makes the whole apartment smell divine.
Declan looks around my childhood apartment in the same way one would analyze a museum exhibit. I’m sure his skin itches to find the nearest exit.
Compared to his home, ours bursts with colors, fabrics, and photographs.
“This is where you grew up?” He pauses at each framed drawing I made for my mom when I was a kid.
“Spent most of my life here.”
He seems somewhat horrified by that fact as his eyes dart across a water stain.
I speak up. “Although the carpet was in better condition back then.”
“One could only hope.”
He picks up a frame of Mom, Nana, and me at my high school graduation. Tears stream down Mom’s face despite her wide smile. We weren’t sure if I would ever walk across that stage, but I overcame the challenges and persevered. It only took a repeated grade and hundreds of tutoring sessions to get there.
He assesses the photo in a way that makes me feel like I’m some kind of science experiment. My skin prickles with anticipation as I wait for him to say something. Anything really would suffice compared to his silence.
“I take it you three are close?”
“Depends on the day and if Nana took her meds that morning.”
“I heard that!” Nana yells back.
Declan’s eyes seem warmer than usual. “I can imagine growing up in a home like this came with its… perks.”
The way he says it with a scrunched-up nose makes me laugh.
“I never thought I would see the day when my daughter fell in love.”
Mom cuts into our conversation.
Declan lets out a noise that can be classified as a laugh.
I glare at my mom. “You just love to embarrass me, don’t you?”
“You think this is embarrassing? I haven’t even offered to show Declan your baby album yet.”
“You wouldn’t.”
Mom only laughs. She wipes her palms across her apron before offering her hand to Declan. “It’s nice to meet you, Declan. I’ve heard so many good things about you.”
I point at Mom. “Don’t lie. It does scary things for his ego.”
Declan’s gaze swings between my mother and me before he grabs her hand. He gives it a firm shake. “The pleasure is all mine.”
It’s as if his grumbling in the car on our way here never happened.
Asshole.
“Please come and sit. Can I get you a drink?”
We both sit on my mom’s retro couch. The flowers are grossly outdated and the complete opposite of Declan’s posh home, but it reminds me of Friday movie nights and Nana falling asleep to her Korean dramas.