“He’s probably blaming himself. He probably feels like he could have done something if he’d stayed in the city.” I dropped the napkin next to my plate and reached for the wine again. “That’s why I always cover for him. Tell Dad that he’s busy. That he has a new job. That he’s living his life. That he’s an adult and we need to give him some room to grow on his own. But I’m not sure I believe that myself anymore.” I downed the contents of my glass. “I think there’s something he’s not telling us. Something he’s keeping from me.”
Lucas nodded, momentarily averting his gaze. “What do you think that could be?”
Closing my eyes, I shook my head. “I don’t know, Lucas.” I zeroed back on him and forced a smile. “See? A two glasses kind of night.”
Lucas remained silent for a few seconds, seemingly lost in thought. Then he said, “Sometimes we keep things from those we love for reasons we don’t even understand ourselves.”
And for some reason I couldn’t really explain, his words felt like a confession.
He continued, “Give him some time. He’ll realize on his own how isolating secrets can be.”
A little lost in the shadows crossing his expression, it took me some time to answer. “I hope you’re right, Dr. Phil.”
Shifting in my seat I remembered that I wasn’t the only one in the room that had had a strange day. “I should probably go. You must be exhausted after the weirdest twenty-four hours of your life.”
He chuckled, returning to his lighthearted self. “I wouldn’t say weird,” he admitted.
I wouldn’t, either, I thought. But I didn’t say anything and rose to my feet instead, the couple glasses of wine I’d ingested in the span of a few minutes racing straight to my head and making me wobble for the tiniest second.
Lucas’s brows wrinkled.
“Whoops, I stood up too fast.” I played it down with a light laugh. “Well, dinner was great, Lucas. Seriously. The best I’ve had in a while. Thanks again for inviting me.”
His mouth twitched, making me hope for one last sunny grin before leaving but it never really happened. Instead, he stood up and walked to the living room area of the studio. Leaving me there, staring at the way his wide and lean back shifted with every step. He plopped himself down on the large couch I knew my best friend had splurged on about a year ago.
He reached for the remote and turned the TV on. He tapped on the smart TV options, displaying the subscription apps. “She really has every single streaming service I can think of.”
“Uhm,” I muttered, wondering if I was getting a goodbye from him. “Yeah. We spend a lot of nights in.” More like all of them. “Or used to, before Aaron and the wedding.”
And it hit me right then, that maybe Lucas wasn’t the only one that had been feeling a little lonely lately. Maybe I was, too.
He turned, looking at me over his shoulder. “Are you coming?”
I blinked.
Lucas’s smirk returned. “Don’t look at me like that. I’ll let you pick.”
I hesitated. “I… I should probably start gathering my things. I have a lot of stuff and I unpacked more than necessary. I also didn’t get around to booking something for the night and I should do that.” And that was evidence of how scattered my thoughts had been today. Because I was “Always Ready Rosie,” and any other day that would have been at the top of my list. Done and ready.
“Or,” Lucas pointed out, “you can relax while we watch something, and then I’ll help you get your stuff.” He looked down at his watch. “It’s only 8:30 p.m. And I don’t give remote rights to just anybody.”
“I guess…” I took one small step forward, feeling my head sway. This is why I don’t usually drink. “I guess relaxing for a bit won’t hurt.” Another step. “I guess… I could stay.”
“Then, what are you waiting for, Rosie?”
Yep. I didn’t just guess. I wanted to stay badly enough to close the rest of the distance, snag the remote out of his grip, and join him on the couch. Or at least the wine did.
* * *
A couple of episodes of my favorite show later, I had not only relaxed but succumbed to the mental exhaustion of the last hours—and days and weeks.
Shifting my lax body on the couch, I turned and let my head fall on the pillow. My drowsy eyes took in Lucas’s profile.
Defined nose, strong jaw, high cheekbones, full lips… and that hair. Those locks that were on the longer side and that still managed to make my stomach dip with surprise and something else. Something… warmer that I didn’t want to think too much about. Not when I could just look at him.