“The Psycho Landlord?” Lucas grunted.
His reaction made something in my belly tumble. “He said the contractor might take some additional time to finish.”
Lucas didn’t say anything, not right away. Then he sighed. “You’re right, this is not date night talk.”
Nodding my head, I took a few more slices of the sausage. “I know, but I just wanted to say how grateful I am for you letting me stay in Lina’s place with you and that if this is turning into too much, I could still look for someplace else. Just say the word.”
He seemed to think about his answer. “You’re comfortable staying with me.”
My hand halted in the air. “Of course, I am.”
“And if there’s something that bothers you, you will tell me.” He held up a piece of juicy mozzarella. “This will complement the finocchiona you’ve picked.” He shredded it with his fingers roughly. “Even if it’s me snoring.”
“You don’t snore.”
“Or me being a little chaotic in the kitchen. Or the music I play when I’m cooking. You’d tell me, right?”
He was ridiculous. “Lucas, it’s you, the one sleeping on a couch when you were promised a complete studio apartment. Bed included.” I shook my head, observing my work. “Meanwhile, I have a handsome man cooking delicious, five-star meals for me every night of the week. Why would I ever be uncomfortable?”
“Hmm, okay,” Lucas said, seemingly appeased. “And I’m also happy to hear you think I’m all that handsome and irresistible.”
Oh, dammit. That had totally slipped.
I rolled my eyes. “I didn’t say anything about being irresistible.”
“Ahem.”
“And it’s not like you didn’t know you’re handsome.” Or irresistible.
I glanced to my left to find him leaning on his side, his arms crossed in front of his chest casually, his gaze on me. In fact, he looked like he’d been done with his pizza for a long time.
Without thinking too much about it, I said, “You’ve dated plenty.” I used his own words. “All those girls must have told you you’re handsome.”
He shrugged. “You’ve been my first date in a long time so maybe I needed the reminder.”
Experimental date, I felt the need to correct him. Even if only for myself.
I searched his face. “You never said why you’re not dating anymore.”
“It’s not something I can focus on right now.”
“Because of your career as a pro?”
Lucas hesitated, and I watched a shadow cross his features. “Something like that.”
I didn’t want to reveal myself, my feelings, but I had to ask. “Are you excited to return? After you recover from… whatever happened?” His eyes narrowed slightly and I felt the need to say, “Lina said you were smashing competition after competition. You had sponsors, and social presence… You were killing it. Before the break.” Lina had never told me all that much about Lucas. I’d gathered most info from his social media. From how much he had shared online before he’d vanished completely weeks before the wedding. “So, I just wondered.”
Lucas swallowed. And he stayed quiet so long that I thought he wasn’t going to say anything. I started turning away from him, just to hide the disappointment of him not confiding in me, but just as I moved, his hand wrapped around my elbow.
“I can’t do any of it anymore, Rosie,” he said, and I could feel the weight behind his words, as if these were rocks he was hardly able to lift. “I… won’t be able to surf ever again. Not at the level I did. Not even close.” His gaze tipped down to the leg I knew bothered him more than he wanted to show. “So, that career as a pro? It’s not exactly stopping me from anything. Especially not dating. What will I be offering anyone anyway, huh?”
And oh.
Oh my God. This wasn’t just a vacation. He wasn’t taking time off to recover from anything.
And I… Lord, I wanted to wrap my arms around him. To smack myself for asking those questions because it must have been so incredibly hard for him to answer them.
I also wanted him to tell me everything. How he felt and how it had happened. I was on the quest to know all there was to know about Lucas Martín and it wasn’t because I was curious, but because I cared.
But Lucas looked at me like he’d just been cut open, exposed, and had nothing left in him to deal with that conversation. So I didn’t ask. This was big enough already. He’d given me a meaningful, crucial part of who he was today. Now. Not the social media persona he once had been that I had happened to spy on.