“Where are you going?” I stood, too, hurrying after him as he crossed the crowded coffee shop and shoved the door open. “Peter, wait!” I called, trying to keep my voice down as we stepped out onto the busy sidewalk. I moved aside as a group of young women scurried past us, laughing loudly at a joke we hadn’t heard. “Wait!” I shouted, grabbing his arm.
“Wait for what?” He spun around, tearing his arm away from me. “What could you possibly want me to wait for? What could we possibly still have to talk about?”
“I—” I tried to think, tried to find something I could say that would make sense.
“Unless you don’t want me to leave,” he offered, the anger dissipating from his voice.
“We aren’t done talking.”
“Oh, I think we are.” He turned away from me again.
“I don’t want you to leave,” I blurted out, grabbing his arm again.
When he turned to face me, the smug grin on his face was enough to make me sick. “I knew it.”
“Don’t make this a thing.”
“Why don’t you want me to leave, Ainsley? Because you love me?”
“I’m…” I couldn’t lie. “It’s hard to walk away.”
“Then don’t.” He closed the space between us in an instant, gathering up my hands in his. “Don’t do this. Please.” He lifted our hands to his lips and kissed my fingers. “I love you. I love our family. We can fix this. You can fix this. You fix everything else. Please fix this.”
I was silent for a moment, trying to think. It was all too much. The conflicting emotions, the panic, the fear. The anger. “Can…can we go for a drive?”
He pulled the keys from his pocket triumphantly and jutted his head toward our SUV across the street. “Sure. Of course.”
I followed him to the vehicle with apprehension, still not sure it was the best idea, but it was the only idea I had.
He opened my door for me, waiting until I was inside before shutting it. Once he was in his seat, he locked the doors. I swallowed, gripping the door with sweating palms.
Breathe.
Just breathe.
“Now then, where to?” He started the SUV with a smile plastered on his lips. Would I ever be able to feel normal with him again? He pulled out of the parking space and outstretched his hand, waiting for me to place mine in his waiting palm.
When I did, he rubbed his thumb across my knuckles slowly, reminding me of the many times he’d done that to keep me calm. During labor with the kids, during a scary movie, during a particularly stressful dinner with my parents.
Once, Peter had been loving.
And then I’d met the monster.
Foolishly, I’d believed I could save the loving part of him, despite the monster’s powers, but now…now, I knew differently. The evil inside my husband was never just a part of him. It was all of him.
His love was meant to wield power over us all.
And I’d almost let him win.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
PETER
We drove hand in hand as if nothing bad had ever happened between us. As if the past few days and weeks had been merely a nightmare. Maybe one day, we’d look back and think that’s all it was.
A guy could dream, anyway.
“The kids will be so excited,” I said after a long while of riding in silence.
“Mhm,” she agreed halfheartedly.
“I know you’re worried. I get it, I really do. But I promise you, you’re going to be so impressed with how much I’ve changed. I told you once before that you fixed me, but maybe that didn’t stick. Now, though, this time it really worked. You scared me straight, Ains. I’ll never, never hurt you again.”
She nodded, then looked over at me and spoke with a soft voice, “How can you be sure?”
“Because I thought I’d lost you,” I said with an exasperated sigh. “I thought I’d lost the kids. There’s not much I’m afraid of in this world, Ainsley, but that tops the list.”
She was silent, but I was winning her over. I could see it in her eyes. I wanted to make her remember who we’d been. Why we were still worth fighting for.
I pulled over when I spied a gas station.
“What are you doing?”
“You’ll see. Wait here.” I stepped out of the SUV and shut the door, locking it behind me just in case. Inside, I found a bag of her favorite chocolate-covered peanuts, two burgers, and a bottle of red wine. At the counter, I paid for the items and made my way back outside, swinging the bag carelessly around my wrist. The pure joy I felt in that moment was unlike anything I’d ever experienced.