“Pointers? With an S? As in Dave wasn’t the only thing she shared?”
“The rest weren’t bad.”
“Let’s hear them anyway.”
“She told me if I want to get my way with you, to bake anything with peanut butter in it—cookies, pie, brownies…”
“If you can bake a peanut butter pie like Kitty, you might work out here after all.” My phone vibrated in my pocket, so I slipped it out to see if it was important. I shook my head and turned it to show her Kitty’s name flashing on the screen. “I only heard the tail end of your conversation. Am I about to get my ass kicked for something you told her?”
“Nope. I told her you’d been nothing but sweet to me.” She winked. “Basically, I lied.”
I pretended to scowl and swiped to answer without moving from the doorway. “Hello, grandmother dearest.”
“What did you have for dinner?”
“Dinner? Nothing. I haven’t eaten yet.”
“Good. Neither did my Everly. She’s still in the office, so take her to grab a bite. And be nice. You’ve been giving her a hard time, and I know it. I can tell even though she covers for your sorry ass.”
I looked up and locked eyes with Evie. “How can you tell she’s lying about me being nice?”
“She oversold it—called you delightful. We both know that’s a load of crap. Now, are you going to do this for me or not?”
“Don’t you have some fourteenth cousin to bug?”
“Yes, and he might be going in my will if you use that tone with me much longer. Oh, and while you’re at dinner, give Everly the name of a bulldog lawyer. She needs one.”
“Goodbye, Grams.”
“Later, masturbater.”
The phone went dead, and I pulled it away from my ear and shook my head at it. “Aren’t people supposed to mellow in their old age?”
“Not Kitty, and she’d kick your ass if she heard you refer to her as old.”
I smiled and stuffed my phone back in my pocket. “How did your first day go?”
“It went well. I think I got a lot accomplished. I went around and met everyone, started reading employee files, and made my first few appointments.”
“Good.” I nodded and thumbed behind me. “I should get going. Don’t stay too long.”
“I won’t. I was just cleaning up to head out.”
“See you tomorrow.” I turned, but Evie’s voice stopped me after my first step.
“Also, I’ll make sure to tell Kitty you didn’t take me to get that bite to eat.”
I squinted. “You heard that?”
Evie shrugged. “Kitty talks loud on the phone.”
“Are you blackmailing me for a meal?”
She opened a drawer, pulled out her purse, and shut her laptop. “I’m starving and broke. Plus, I have questions about the hierarchy here at the company and the structure of compensation. I’d like to understand where all the different pressures come from.”
“What if I say it’s not appropriate for us to have dinner?”
She rolled her eyes. “You’ve seen me in my bra, and you told me you hired me because I was the least-competent person. Plus, this is a business meal, not for pleasure. You’re not my type.”
I felt oddly offended. “Why not?”
“Because you have a penis. At least I assume you do. And I haven’t forgiven your kind for all the wrongs they’ve caused.”