He climbs out of bed and walks three doors down the hallway of a hotel in Macon, Georgia. He knocks, and Skylar Jones answers, bleary-eyed and still wearing sweats. “Charlie? What is it?”
Charlie takes exactly three deep breaths. “Can we talk?”
Story notes for editors: Season 37, Episode 9
Story producer:
Ryan Parker
Air date:
Monday, November 8, 2021
Executive producer: Maureen Scott
Scene: Confessional with Lauren Long during her Home Kingdom date Location: Shot on location in Dallas Lauren L.: I can’t believe Charlie’s here! I’ve dreamed about this day for so long! It’s all I’ve ever wanted—to have someone like him to bring home. He’s everything I’ve always pictured for my future, and now it’s real! I’m about to introduce my future husband to my parents!
THREE MONTHS AFTER FILMING
Raleigh, North Carolina—Monday, November 8, 2021
Dev
On a Monday night in November, the second-to-last episode of Charlie Winshaw’s season of Ever After airs to twenty-three million viewers. Dev Deshpande is not one of them. Monday nights are when he schedules his appointments, and it’s dark outside the office in east Raleigh where he sits, waiting, while his therapist brews two mugs of peppermint tea.
Dev reaches into a box full of fidget spinners and other stimming toys and pulls out a neon purple squishy ball. He knows now that his need to stay busy, to never stop moving, was a way to avoid confronting the parts of his life that weren’t working, but he also knows having something to do with his hands makes those confrontations a little bit easier. He’s learned a lot about himself in this office these past three months.
Alex Santos steeps the tea leaves into the twin mugs, then crosses the room to their wingback chair. “So,” Alex asks, their head cocked to the side in a way that reminds Dev of Jules. He doesn’t want to think about her tonight but forces himself to confront the too-big feelings in his chest. “How are you doing?”
Dev squeezes the purple ball. “I’m okay.”
His therapist gives him a searching look, and Dev understands. He knows okay was his refrain for a long time.
“I really am okay. I’m mostly relieved. It’s almost over.”
Alex shifts in their chair. “How will things be different once the season is finally done airing?”
“Well, presumably the crew will stop trying to call me and text me and email me every five seconds,” he starts. Not that he’s talked to anyone since Macon. He deleted all his social media, and he deletes every text message sight unseen. Even the ones from Jules, until she stopped trying to reach out altogether. He’s built a small life for himself here—living at his parents’ house, writing every day in his childhood bedroom, leaving the house only for biweekly therapy sessions and walking his mother’s Maltese around the park—but at least it’s a life without Ever After. Without the toxicity and the pretend.
“And once the hype dies down, I won’t have to worry about seeing his face on magazine covers in the grocery store checkout line.”
“Is it still hard to see him?”
He squeezes the purple ball harder. “You know, Alex, one of these days, you’re going to make a declarative statement, and that will be when we really level up in our therapy-ship.”
Alex purses their lips disapprovingly. “You want a declarative statement? You are using humor to deflect from your very real emotional pain.”
“Touché.”
Alex smiles and gets up to fetch the tea. It took Dev weeks to get a smile out of his therapist, but it turns out someone gruff and no-nonsense was what he needed after upending his entire life. He needed someone who wouldn’t be charmed into thinking he was okay. Alex always sees through his bullshit and always calls him on it.