Jeez.
“I wanted to experience a life where nobody knew who I was. I wanted to make friends who I knew for certain liked me for me and not my bank balance or my social status.”
I frown as I listen.
“And then I met you.” He smiles softly as he looks down at me. “And you were so different to anyone I had ever met. Kind and sweet. Beautiful.” He frowns. “With a well-hidden temper.”
I smile, embarrassed.
“And I fell madly in love.”
I get a lump in my throat as I listen.
“And it was selfish, I know. But I wanted all the time alone with you that I could get, every single minute, where our life was simple. Because I knew that the moment you found out about my money that it would change your perception of me.”
My eyes well with tears.
It did.
“Hayden . . . my life is complicated. And busy and super stressful. The one pure, joyful, and real thing in it . . . is you.” He lifts my hand and kisses my fingertips. “You have taught me so much about love and what I want from life.”
I smile through tears.
“The man you met on the trip is the real me. I haven’t lied about my feelings about you at all. I can promise you that what we have is one hundred percent real.”
“I have no idea how to live this life, Christopher,” I whisper.
“I know.”
“It terrifies me.”
“I know, baby.” He bends and kisses me. “Just give me three months.”
I frown.
“I have to go to London for three months. Elliot has been looking after everything, and he has a two-month vacation booked. I have to be there to manage while he’s away. I can’t go without you. Don’t ask me to.”
I stare at him.
“If you just . . . try it for three months, and then we can . . .”
“Can what?”
“Reevaluate where you want to live.”
“What if I hate London?”
He stares at me. “Then we have to reevaluate the situation.”
“What does that mean?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “I would be lying if I said I did.” He frowns as if getting his wording right. “With my role at Miles Media comes a great deal of responsibility. I don’t have the freedom that a cleaner would have to live where he pleases.”
He kisses me softly as he cups my face in his hand. “Give me three months. That’s all I’m asking.”
I stare at him.
“Hayden . . . I love you. We need to work this out, because now that I know how perfect a life with you is, I can’t go back. And I know this isn’t the life you planned . . . but as long as we’re together, do the semantics really matter?” His eyes search mine, and he looks so lost and sad, and my heart constricts.
This fight is stupid.
I’m upset, and this lie is unforgivable, but on some level, I do understand. I can’t imagine living this life and never knowing what is real.
“You’re right.” I lean up and kiss him tenderly. “As long as we’re together.” My lips linger over his, and his arms snap around me, and we hold each other close, cheek to cheek, raw emotion running between us.
“I’m sorry I was a bitch last night.”
I feel him smile above me. “You really were.”