“Dean,” I gasp. “I…”
I don’t know what to say. I have been horrible to him. I haven’t returned any of his calls. He deserves so much better.
He holds up a hand. “I’ll keep this quick.”
“Dean, I’m so sorry…”
“Stop.” He shakes his head. “I’m not going to stalk you. If you don’t want me—fine. I get it.”
“It’s not… that’s not…”
He shakes his head. When he’s not smiling, there’s no trace of that dimple, but he’s still so handsome. “I had a great time with you the other night. I feel like there’s something between us—something real. I just wanted to tell you that. But you won’t return my calls, so here I am. Telling you.”
I want to cry. That night we had together was one of the best nights I’ve ever had. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m such a mess. Dean is better off without me.
“I told you, I don’t play games,” he says. “I like you, and I’m telling you so. I like you. A lot.” He pauses. “Even if that makes me an idiot.”
“You’re not an idiot.”
He smiles crookedly. “I’m not so sure.”
“You have to understand that I—”
He holds his hand up again. “Save it. I don’t want the excuses. If you’re interested, give me a call. If not, well, I hope you have a good life.”
He means it. Even as awful as I’ve been to him, he doesn’t wish me any ill will. It makes me think of the things I’ve done to Olive. I was petty and horrible. I hate myself.
But things are different now. After what Nick told me, I have to take action. This isn’t a matter of getting revenge for having been wronged.
I don’t promise Dean I’ll call him. He doesn’t want an empty promise and I won’t do that to him. I watch him walk away with a sinking feeling in my stomach that I’m making the worst mistake of my life.
Chapter 48: The New Girl
Joel doesn’t contact Cassie at all after he leaves the bookstore.
It’s unusual to not even get one text from him in an entire afternoon when he’s not working. She tries to push away the sick feeling in her stomach, but it’s hard. He’s obviously gutted over what happened to Francesca.
When Cassie gets out her phone for the tenth time to check for a missed text, Zoe gives her a look. “Quit being needy. He’ll call you soon.”
“He was really upset…”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Zoe says.
“I accused his dead girlfriend of stalking me.”
She lets out a huff. “It’s his fault for not telling you she’s dead. What the hell is wrong with him?”
Cassie wracks her brain for missed cues that Francesca was gone. She always seemed so present in their lives, even when she wasn’t actually there. Even her restaurant is still open. How could a woman like that be dead?
“Go home,” Zoe says. “You’re hurting our sales with your bad attitude.”
Cassie snorts. They’ve only had two people come into the store all afternoon, both of them looking for medical books. It’s time for Bookland to close its doors. She can’t keep this up—not if she wants to avoid serious repercussions.
It’s already dark out, even though it’s barely dinnertime. They won’t have many more customers tonight, if any. So Cassie decides to take Zoe’s advice and head home early.