I text my brothers and let them know that my part of the plan is complete. Now it’s up to them to secure their parts.
I pull up my messages with Zahra and text her, hoping she will finally give me the chance I need to convince her that I’m serious about us.
Me: Will you come over tonight and hear me out?
Me: Please.
I tack on the second message for bonus points.
Her response is instant.
Zahra: Okay. Only because you asked nicely.
Zahra: But don’t get your hopes up.
Too late. For the first time in weeks, I finally smile.
I pace the front porch. The wood creaks under my shoes with every step. A twig snaps and I look up to find Zahra walking up the driveway wearing the same white dress as earlier. The colors of the sunset make the perfect backdrop for her, and I find myself getting lost in how beautiful she is.
The only thing missing is her smile. After today, I swear to never make her feel anything but happy around me. While it might seem like an impossible goal, I’m all about achieving the unattainable.
Zahra walks up the steps, keeping her face neutral. She makes a move toward the front door but I steer her toward the swinging bench I’ve come to appreciate. I’m hoping it brings me some courage to get through everything I’m about to unleash.
Now’s a good time to wish me luck, Mom.
“So…” Zahra rocks back and forth, making the swing move.
“When my grandfather sent me here as part of his will, I never thought I would meet someone as special as you. It was supposed to be a simple project. But I should have known things wouldn’t go according to plan the moment you fell into my lap—quite literally. It’s like life kept throwing you in my way time and time again hoping I would get the memo. I was too stubborn to realize that you were always meant to be mine, Zahra. And because of that, I made mistakes. I lied about who I was. I refused to trust you even though I knew deep down I could. And most of all, I pushed you away when you did nothing but open your heart up to me without any reciprocation. I took your love for granted when I should have cherished it. Because to be loved by you is a gift. One that I threw away because I was too stupid and selfish to give you that kind of power over me in return.”
Her eyes soften around the edges, and she pulls my hand onto her lap.
“You were right when you said you deserve better. You always have and you always will. But I refuse to let you go. I can’t let you go because you’re the one person in this entire world who makes me want to smile, and I’m too damn selfish to let the best thing in my life get away from me because I’m afraid.”
Her eyes fill with tears but she blinks the tears away before they fall.
I give her hand a squeeze. “Truth is, I’m terrified of falling in love. But I’d rather trust you with my heart and risk you breaking it than live another day without you in my life. I want to be the kind of man that deserves a woman as beautiful, selfless, and kind as you. It might take my entire life to achieve that kind of goal, but as long as you’re by my side, I’d consider it a life worth living.”
Her bottom lip wobbles and I trace it with my thumb.
“And while I know I don’t deserve you, I’ll spend every single day proving to you how much I love you.”
A tear slips out, and I brush it away with the pad of my thumb.
“What about moving back to Chicago?”
“Fuck Chicago. There’s nothing I want more than to stay here with you and build a life together.”
“A kiss for a secret?” Her voice cracks.
I nod.
Her lips press against mine. I sigh as I wrap my hand around the back of her neck and pull her close. I pour every feeling into that kiss, hoping she understands how much I care about her. How I never want to let her go.