Matthew frowned. “Did you say Disneyland?”
“Get the hell out of here before I decide you’re trespassing and shoot you.”
“I’m going.” Matthew didn’t sound scared at all, but that was impossible. He was a kid, being threatened by a man holding an ax.
Watching him go hurt more than Leni would have thought possible. She turned away from her father and went into the house and just stood there, staring at nothing, missing Matthew in a way that pushed everything else away.
Mama came in a moment later. She crossed the room, opened her arms, saying, “Oh, baby girl.”
Leni burst into tears. Mama tightened her hold, stroked Leni’s hair, then led her to the sofa, where they sat down.
“You’re attracted to him. How could you not be? He’s gorgeous. And you alone and lonely all these years.”
Leave it to Mama to say the words out loud.
Leni had felt alone for a long time.
“I understand,” Mama said.
It helped, those few words, reminded Leni that in the vast landscape of Alaska, this cabin was a world of its own. And her mama understood.
“It’s dangerous, though. You see that, right?”
“Yeah,” Leni said. “I see it.”
*
FOR THE FIRST TIME, Leni understood all the books she’d read about broken hearts and unrequited love. It was physical, this pain of hers. The way she missed Matthew was like a sickness.
When she woke the next morning, after a restless night, her eyes felt gritty. Light blared down through the skylight, bright enough to force her to shield her eyes from it. She dressed in yesterday’s clothes and climbed down from the loft. Without bothering to eat breakfast, she went outside and fed the animals and jumped onto her bike and rode away. In town, she waved to Large Marge, who was outside the General Store washing windows, and pedaled past Crazy Pete and turned into the school parking lot. Leaving her bicycle in the tall grass by the chain-link fence, she clamped her backpack to her chest and went into the classroom.
Matthew’s desk was empty.
“Makes sense,” she muttered. “He’s probably halfway to Fairbanks after seeing how crazy my dad is.”
“Hey, Leni,” Ms. Rhodes said brightly. “Can you handle teaching today? An injured eagle needs help at the center in Homer. I thought I’d go.”
“Sure. Why not?”
“I knew you’d be my ace in the hole. Moppet is doing some long division and Agnes and Marthe are working on their history papers; you and Matthew are supposed to read T. S. Eliot today.”
Leni forced a smile as Ms. Rhodes left the classroom. She glanced at the clock, thought, Maybe he’s late, and then set about helping the girls with their assignments.
The day crawled forward, with Leni constantly looking at the clock until it finally struck three o’clock.
“That’s it, kiddos. School’s done.”
When the kids were gone and the classroom fell silent, Leni packed up her stuff and was the last person to leave the school.
Outside, she retrieved her bicycle and pedaled idly down the center of Main Street, in no hurry to get home. Overhead, a bush plane puttered in a lazy arc, giving its passengers a good view of the small town perched on a boardwalk along the water’s edge. The marshes behind town were in full bloom, clumps of grass fluttering in the breeze. The air smelled of dust and new grass and murky water. In the distance, a red boat moved among the thick growth on its way out to the sea. She heard hammering at the saloon, but there were no workers to be seen outside.
She came to the bridge. Normally, on a day this bright at the start of the season, it would be crammed with men and women and children standing shoulder to shoulder, lines in the water, the kids on tiptoes, peering over the edge into the crystal-clear river below.
Now there was only one person standing here.
Matthew.
She coasted to a stop, stepped down on one foot, rested the other on the pedal. “What are you doing?”
“Waiting.”
“For what?”
“You.”
Leni dismounted the bike and fell into step beside him as he led her back toward town. The bicycle clanged and thumped over the bumpy gravel of Main Street. Every now and then the bell made a shivering little ringing sound.
Leni glanced nervously at the saloon as they passed it, but didn’t see Clyde or Ted working. She didn’t want anyone to tell her dad they’d seen her with Matthew.
They hiked up the hill past the church and ducked into the Sitka spruce trees. Leni set her bike down and followed Matthew to the point that jutted out over a black rock cliff.