I have trouble sleeping at night.
When you’re in prison, you’re always sleeping with one eye open. You don’t want things to be going on around you without you knowing about it. And now that I’m out, the instinct hasn’t left me. When I first got an actual bed, I was able to sleep really well for a while, but now my old insomnia has come back full force. Especially because my bedroom is so unbearably stuffy.
My first paycheck has been deposited in my bank account, and the next chance I have, I’m going to go out and buy myself a television for my bedroom. If I turn on the television, I might be able to drift off to sleep with it on. The sound will mimic the noise at night in the prison.
Up until now, I’ve been hesitant to use the Winchesters’ television. Not the huge home theater, obviously, but their “normal” TV in the living room. It doesn’t seem like it should be a big deal, considering Nina and Andrew go to bed early. They have a very specific routine every night. Nina goes upstairs to put Cecelia to bed at precisely 8:30. I can hear her reading a bedtime story, then she sings to her. Every night she sings the same song: “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” from The Wizard of Oz. Nina doesn’t sound like she has any vocal training, but there’s something strangely, hauntingly beautiful about the way she sings to Cecelia.
After Cecelia goes to sleep, Nina reads or watches television in the bedroom. Andrew follows upstairs not long after. If I come downstairs after ten o’clock, the first floor is completely empty.
So this particular night I decided to take advantage.
This is why I’m sprawled out on the sofa, watching an episode of Family Feud. It’s nearly one in the morning, so the high energy level of the contestants seems almost bizarre. Steve Harvey is joking around with them, and despite how tired I am, I laugh out loud when one of the contestants gets up to demonstrate his tap-dancing skills. I used to watch the show when I was a kid, and I always imagined going on it myself; I’m not sure who I would’ve invited to go with me. My parents, me—that’s three. Who else could I have invited?
“Is that Family Feud?”
I jerk my head up. Even though it’s the middle of the night, Andrew Winchester is somehow standing behind me, as wide awake as the people on the television screen.
Damn. I knew I should have stayed in my room.
“Oh!” I say. “I, uh… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to…”
He arches an eyebrow. “What are you sorry for? You live here, too. You have every right to watch the television.”
I grab a pillow from the couch to conceal my flimsy gym shorts that I’ve been sleeping in. Also, I’m not wearing a bra. “I was going to buy a set for my room.”
“It’s fine to use our monitor, Millie. You probably won’t get much reception up there anyway.” The whites of his eyes glow in the light of the television. “I’ll be out of your hair in a minute. I’m just grabbing a glass of water.”
I sit on the couch, clutching the pillow to my chest, debating if I should go upstairs. I’m never going to fall asleep now because my heart is racing. He said he was just getting some water, so maybe I can stay. I watch him shuffle into the kitchen and I hear the tap running.
He comes back into the living room, sipping from his water glass. That’s when I notice he’s only got on a white undershirt and boxers. But at least he’s not shirtless.
“How come you poured water from the sink?” I can’t help but ask him.
He plops down next to me on the sofa, even though I wish he wouldn’t. “What do you mean?”
It would be rude to jump off the sofa, so I just scoot down as far as I can. The last thing I need is for Nina to see the two of us getting cozy together on the sofa in our underwear. “Like, you didn’t use the water filter in the refrigerator.”
He laughs. “I don’t know. I’ve always just gotten water from the sink. Like, is it poison?”
“I don’t know. I think it has chemicals in it.”
He runs a hand through his dark hair until it sticks up a bit. “I’m hungry for some reason. Any leftovers from dinner in the fridge?”
“No, sorry.”
“Hmm.” He rubs his stomach. “Would it be really bad manners if I eat some peanut butter right out of the jar?”
I cringe at the mention of peanut butter. “As long as you’re not eating in front of Cecelia.”
He tilts his head. “Why?”
“You know. Because she’s allergic.” They really don’t seem very respectful of Cecelia’s deadly peanut allergy in this household.